Same Old, Nothing New
by SilverHeart09
Summary: The sequel to 'Busy Day At The Office'- Hope you enjoy it! Featuring all the Marvel characters I can think of, please review!
1. Chapter 1

_As promised, the sequel to 'Busy Day At The Office' in the same format with some new characters :) I can't remember who it was that wanted me to include Ghost Rider but I have :) Wolverine is also featured in this story._

_The three main formats are: Formspring (question and answer site), Facebook and IM. (When it says Tony Stark Q: - It's someone asking Tony a question, not Tony asking someone a question)_

_Enjoy and review! (If there are any more Marvel characters you would like me to include please review and let me know!)_

* * *

Tony Stark Q: Would you sleep with a guy?

A: Tell me you're kidding, and I KNOW this is you Steve.

Via Formspring

* * *

**Pepperpot has just signed in**

_Pepperpot: _How's the leg?

**Bossman has changed his name to 'StarkArc'**

_StarkArc: _XO

_Pepperpot: _(winces in sympathy) Oh Tony, and I love the new name :)

_StarkArc: _Thanks; I thought it was better than 'Bossman' considering that you're running the company WITH me now :)

_Pepperpot: _Deary me, I think the smilies have taken over our souls.

_StarkArc: _(sighs) There goes our sanities :P

_Pepperpot: _I lost mine when I started working for you :P

_StarkArc: _You wouldn't have it any other way though... right?

_Pepperpot: _Right Tony :)

* * *

**Tony Stark 'MY LEG REALLY HURTS!'**

_**Natasha Romanoff likes this. **_

_**Tony Stark posted something on Natasha Romanoff's Wall.**_

Tony Stark: HOW CAN YOU LIKE MY STATUS!

_**James Rhodes likes Tony Stark's status.**_

_**Nick Fury likes Tony Stark's status.**_

_**Peter Parker likes Tony Stark's status.**_

_**Natasha Romanoff commented on her Wall Post. **_

Natasha Romanoff: It's just that we all KNOW that your leg hurts; you haven't stopped moaning about it!

_**Tony Stark commented on Natasha Romanoff's Wall Post.**_

Tony Stark: Have you ever broken your leg in two places? Actually don't answer that, you've probably broken it in MORE than two places, and I doubt you've only broken your leg as well :P

_**Natasha Romanoff commented on her Wall Post.**_

Natasha Romanoff: Damn right, I didn't moan about it either.

_**Tony Stark commented on Natasha Romanoff's Wall Post.**_

Tony Stark: Now THAT I don't believe.

* * *

**EpicShield has just signed in.**

_EpicShield: _Leg still hurt Tony?

**BlackWidow has just signed in.**

_BlackWidow: _WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

_EpicShield: _I'm guessing he's been moaning about nothing BUT his leg?

_StarkArc: _I do not moan!

_WebSwinger: _YES YOU DO!

_StarkArc: _NO I DON'T!

_Pepperpot: _Cool it boys.

_BlackWidow: _Tony doesn't moan... he's just been keeping us updated.

_StarkArc: _That was so obviously BLATANT sarcasm.

_BlackWidow: _(coughs)

**ManWithThePatch has just signed in.**

_ManWithThePatch: _Who fancies going to North Korea this evening?

_WebSwinger: _Oh come on, WHY?

_ManWithThePatch: _Human shields and illegal cases of weapons, and no Tony you are NOT coming.

_StarkArc: _WHY?

_BlackWidow: _You have a broken leg remember? You HAVE been keeping us updated ALL morning.

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'Grumbling.'**

_Pepperpot: _Tony, you are staying here, no arguments.

**ManWithThePatch has changed his status to 'Agreeing with Pepper.'**

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'Throwing A Cushion At Fury.'**

* * *

Tony Stark Q: Are you omnisexual?

A: Steve, your mind is worse than mine.

Via Formspring

* * *

**StarkTony has 1 unread email from PottsPepper**

Notification via Facebook.

Pepper Potts has invited you to the event 'Movie Night with me this evening.' Please follow the link below to RSVP.

_**Tony Stark is attending 'Movie Night with me this evening.'**_

**StarkTony has 1 unread email from PottsPepper**

Better than flying to North Korea?

Pepper xxx

**PottsPepper had 1 unread email from StarkTony**

Much :)

Tony xxxxxx

* * *

_WebSwinger: _See you tomorrow hopefully.

_StarkArc: _Don't do anything I wouldn't do.

_WebSwinger: _Does that mean I can't blow stuff up?

_StarkArc: _Leave that to the professionals Pete.

**WebSwinger has changed his status to 'Muttering Rude Words Under His Breath.'**

_Wolvie: _I heard that.

_StarkArc: _You mean you actually WERE muttering rude words under your breath?

_Wolvie: _He said one and it wasn't that bad.

_StarkArc: _Any rude word Pete says is bad purely because he NEVER says rude words.

_DeathOnABike: _Um... hi?

_StarkArc: ?_

_WebSwinger: ?_

**ManWithThePatch has just signed in**

_ManWithThePatch: _Everyone, this is Johnny Blaze, his team name is Ghost Rider. Johnny, this is Tony Stark, Peter Parker, and Logan, aka: Iron Man, Spiderman and Wolverine. Now I have to go and prep everyone for the mission. Pete, get over here.

_WebSwinger: _Charming.

**WebSwinger has signed off.**

**ManWithThePatch has signed off.**

_StarkArc: _Uh... hey Johnny.

_DeathOnABike: _Hey Tony.

**HulkSmash has just signed in.**

_StarkArc: _Bruce, this is Johnny Blaze, say hi.

_HulkSmash: _Hi.

_StarkArc: _Bruce is a man of few words but he means well.

**TooHotToHandle has just signed in.**

_TooHotToHandle: _Apart from when he sat on my car and crushed it flat :P

**EpicShield has just signed in.**

_EpicShield: _Fear not citizens!

_StarkArc: _CUT THAT OUT!

_TooHotToHandle: _It isn't a catchphrase it's just annoying!

**Pepperpot has just signed in.**

_Pepperpot: _TONY!

_StarkArc: _PEPPER!

_Pepperpot: _JARVIS just phoned me informing me that the oven was on fire.

_StarkArc: _...

I'm guessing he's put it out?

_Pepperpot: _Yes, but that isn't the question right now. The question is WHY was the oven on fire.

_StarkArc: _Because it had our dinner in it which I forgot about...

_Pepperpot: _(sigh)

_StarkArc: _I better pop over and sort it out :P You ARE still coming... right?

_Pepperpot: _And miss our movie night? :)

_DeathOnABike: _I'm guessing you two are an item...?

_StarkArc: _You don't read the papers much do you?

_DeathOnABike: _No, not really :P

_StarkArc: _Fair enough. Pepper, Steve and Johnny, this is Johnny Blaze.

_TooHotToHandle: _As in Ghost Rider?

_DeathOnABike: _Yep, that's me.

_EpicShield: _Cool!

_StarkArc: _If you need me I'll be saving our dinner Pepperpot.

_Pepperpot: _I love you Tony.

_StarkArc: _Love you more :)

* * *

Tony Stark Q: Would you ever consider going out on a date with a man?

A: Knock it off, Steve.

Via Formspring

* * *

_Let me know what you think! :D_


	2. Chapter 2

_Chapter 2 ahoy! Based on real life events, most of the speech is a conversation I had with a friend on facebook :) Please review!_

**StarkArc has just signed in**

_StarkArc: _Do you know where I put the ice cream machine Peps?

_Pepperpot: _In the cupboard under the sink.

_StarkArc: _Score :)

**TooHotToHandle has just signed in**

_TooHotToHandle: _Can I have some ice cream?

_StarkArc: _I haven't made it yet!

Do you know where I put the instructions?

_TooHotToHandle: _How am I supposed to know?

_StarkArc: _I was talking to Pepper!

_Pepperpot: _You're on your own with that one :)

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'Hunting For The Instructions'**

**BlackWidow has just signed in**

_BlackWidow: _Fury wants you back at base, Tony.

_StarkArc: _He's going to have to wait.

_BlackWidow: _He wants you back at base NOW.

_StarkArc: _HE'S GOING TO HAVE TO WAIT. I have a broken leg! I can't drop everything I'm doing at Fury's beck and call!

_BlackWidow: _Hey, don't shoot the messenger. And all you're doing is making ice cream!

_StarkArc: _Have you seen how hot it is outside? Ice cream is a necessity in this heat.

_BlackWidow: _I agree with you completely, and I'll put Fury off providing I get ice cream.

_StarkArc: _If I ever find the instructions consider it done.

**BlackWidow has changed her status to 'Hoping Tony finds instructions'**

_StarkArc: _Got them!

**BlackWidow has changed her status to 'Whooping'**

_Pepperpot: _Where were they?

_StarkArc: _In the porch, no idea why :P

_TooHotToHandle: _Maybe they were chilling? Catching some sun?

_StarkArc: _They were in a LARGE METAL BOX, not exactly the PROPER way to go about it :P

_BlackWidow: _Show them how it's done, Tony.

_StarkArc: _Considering I'm as red as a boiled lobster I really doubt they should be following my example.

_Pepperpot: _It's your fault for being out in the sun all day.

_StarkArc: _I LIKE being out in the sun all day!

_Pepperpot: _Even when you go as red as a boiled lobster?

_StarkArc: _Feel free to come on over and rub suntan lotion all over me :D

_TooHotToHandle: _EW!

_BlackWidow: _You can't talk Johnny! What was it I caught you and Paige Dover doing yesterday?

_StarkArc: _Paige Dover? FROM MY STAFF?

_TooHotToHandle: _She's so cute!

_Pepperpot: _I'll never be able to look Paige in the eye again o.O

_StarkArc: _Okay, I like this o.O

_Pepperpot: _Lol :)

_StarkArc: _Machine away!

_Pepperpot: _PLEASE say you didn't throw it out the window!

_StarkArc: _NO I turned it on!

_TooHotToHandle: _How did you turn it on?

_StarkArc: _I pressed the on button!

_TooHotToHandle: _Machines have an on button?

_StarkArc: _Yes! It's usually the big one at the front.

_BlackWidow: _o.O

_StarkArc: _JOHNNY!

_TooHotToHandle: _What? I saw an opportunity, I took it :)

_StarkArc: _I will never look at that machine in the same way again.

_TooHotToHandle: _My work here is done :D

_Pepperpot: _Tony, brace yourself, I'm coming over.

_StarkArc: _:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

_BlackWidow: _'Love is a many splendored thing...'

_StarkArc: _Scored with Hogan yet?

_BlackWidow: _Over and over again ;)

**EpicShield has just signed in**

_EpicShield: _Fear not...

**StarkArc has blocked keyboard control for EpicShield.**

_Pepperpot: _Thank God for that!

_StarkArc: _:)

I thought you were coming over?

_Pepperpot: _On my way now :)

_StarkArc: _:D

* * *

**Tony Stark is making ice cream.**

_Natasha Romanoff and Pepper Potts like this_

**Pepper Potts is in a relationship with Tony Stark**

_21 people like this_

**Tony Stark Likes 'Pepperony Pepper/Tony'**

**Pepper Potts Likes 'Pepperony Pepper/Tony'**

_Tony Stark likes this_

**James Rhodes thinks Tony Stark has too much time on his hands**

_Tony Stark likes this._

**Pepper Potts is married to Tony Stark**

_Tony Stark likes this_

**Natasha Romanoff commented on Pepper Potts' new relationship status**

Natasha Romanoff: When did this happen?

**Pepper Potts commented on her new relationship status**

Pepper Potts: We eloped, hadn't you heard?

**Natasha Romanoff commented on Pepper Potts' new relationship status**

Natasha Romanoff: o.O

**Pepper Potts is in a relationship with Tony Stark**

**Tony Stark preferred it when Pepper said they were married**

**Pepper Potts thinks Tony Stark is adorable**

_Tony Stark likes this_

**Harold Hogan thinks Tony Stark and Pepper Potts should get a room**

**Tony Stark commented on Harold Hogan's status**

Tony Stark: Already have, many times :D

**Pepper Potts wishes Tony Stark would stop broadcasting their relationship around the internet**

_Harold Hogan, Natasha Romanoff and James Rhodes like this_

**Tony Stark thinks the newsreader on CNN blinks too much**

_13 people like this _

**James Rhodes is turning to CNN**

**James Rhodes agrees with Tony Stark**

_Tony Stark and Pepper Potts like this_


	3. Chapter 3

_Again, most of this is based on Facebook conversations; my friends are both awesome and weird :) This chapter also has cartoons which I drew cause I felt like it while watching a film. They're not very GOOD cartoons because I can. Not. Draw. At. All. But hey, they were fun to do :) They can be found on my website which there is a link too on my profile page :) Enjoy and then review!_

**Tony Stark has just found a mouse in the suit. Weirdest. Sensation. Ever o.O**

_34 people like this._

* * *

_Pepperpot: _Does this explain all the girlish screaming I heard coming from downstairs?

_StarkArc: _It was NOT girlish screaming, it took me by surprise. And it's not like you came down to investigate or anything!

_ColonelCool: _A MOUSE took you by surprise.

_StarkArc: _It was a Ninja Mouse!

_Pepperpot: _o.O

_StarkArc: _IT WAS!

_Pepperpot: _I just had an image of a mouse dressed in black creeping up your leg holding numchucks o.O

_StarkArc: _It was like that!

_Pepperpot: _So, for the record, a Ninja Mouse holding nunchucks crawled up your leg wearing black while you, in your Iron Man armour equipped with missiles, guns and repulsors decided to scream like a girl.

_StarkArc: _I did NOT scream like a girl!

_Pepperpot: _Yes you did!

_StarkArc: _No I didn't!

_MostAwesomeAIEver: _I must admit, sir, that if I hadn't already known that you were male I would have assumed that a small girl had made her way into the basement.

_TooHotToHandle: _TOLD!

**StarkArc has blocked MostAwesomeAIEver**

_StarkArc: _I'm going to go play Swingball.

_Pepperpot: _By yourself?

_StarkArc: _Well yeah, since everyone else is being mean :'(

_Pepperpot: _(sighs) I'll come over and play with you.

_StarkArc: _:D

_Pepperpot: _Just be careful of the grass if you're barefoot.

_Stark: _Why? What's it going to do to me? Insult me? I'll insult it right back!

_Pepperpot: _Ha ha.

_StarkArc: _OH HELP OH FOR GOD SAKE SOMEONE HELP ME!

_TooHotToHandle: _What? Tony you okay?

_Pepperpot: _Tony? Tony what's happening!

_StarkArc: _IT'S GOT MY FOOT! ARRRRGGGGH THE GRASS HAS GOT MY FOOT! NOW IT'S GOT MY OTHER ONE! .

_Pepperpot: _Tony! You scared me!

_TooHotToHandle: _Hahahahahahaha

_Pepperpot: _Don't do that again!

_StarkArc: _Sorry Peps, the opportunity was just too good to miss :)

_Pepperpot: _Just for that I might not come round.

_StarkArc: _O.O

_Pepperpot: _What's that meant to be?

_StarkArc: _Puppy eyes, kinda hard to do online o.O

_Pepperpot: _(sighs) Okay fine I'm coming over.

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'Jumping Up And Down In Excitement'**

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'Banging His Head On The Ceiling'**

_StarkArc: _Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

_Pepperpot: _Ice is in the freezer.

_StarkArc: _What would I do without you Pepperpot?

_Pepperpot: _Not alot apparently.

_ColonelCool: _Who DOESN'T know that ice belongs in the freezer? And how are you planning on playing with a broken leg?

_StarkArc: _I will find a way.

_Pepperpot: _Oh dear... I am NOT driving you to the hospital again Tony.

_StarkArc: _:'(

_Pepperpot: _I'm coming over, you better not be doing anything embarrassing...

_StarkArc: _MOI?

**Pepperpot has just signed off**

* * *

Tony Stark Q: Were you doing anything embarrassing?

A: I was painting my toenails, curling my hair and reapplying my makeup. NO! I was watching Monty Python FYI!

Via Formspring

* * *

Tony Stark Q: HAVE you ever done all of those things printed above?

A: Have YOU?

Via Formspring

* * *

Tony Stark Q: You know I have Tony.

A: Ah, you're Rhodey, in which case, you know I have too :P

Via Formspring

* * *

Tony Stark Q: True, True.

A: What a night :)

Via Formspring

* * *

**Pepper Potts enjoyed playing Swingball with Tony Stark**

_21 people like this_

**Tony Stark has discovered how hard it is to play Swingball with a broken leg o.O**

_21 people like this_

**Natasha Romanoff wishes Tony Stark would make some more ice cream**

_Tony Stark, Pepper Potts and Steve Rogers like this_

**Tony Stark is turning the ice cream machine on**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

**Natasha Romanoff commented on Tony Stark's status**

Natasha Romanoff: (A lot, I might add) :)

_Tony Stark likes this_


	4. Chapter 4

_You'll never guess what…_

_I LOST MY MEMORY STICK! And therefore I have also lost all of my schoolwork and even more importantly ALL OF MY STORIES! This is NOT GOOD!_

_So now you know why I haven't updated forever :( _

_Anyway, onwards and upwards, here's chapter 4! I'm such a cheery soul :)_

_Tony, Pepper and Natasha are in a meeting, Rhodey is somewhere else in California._

_Please review :)_

_This chapter is dedicated to Ginger Locks and Shiny 603 for their lovely messages, it made my day :) Also partly to my brother for giving me the x-box idea- he is currently on it now, just like he always is._

**StarkArc has just signed in**

_StarkArc: _Hey Pep, you know how much you love me?

_Pepperpot: _Oh no… what have you done now?

_StarkArc: _I haven't done anything! I'm just making sure that you still love me :)

_Pepperpot: _I still love you, Tony :)

_StarkArc: _Love you too 3

Now do you have ANY IDEA WHAT HE IS TALKING ABOUT?

_Pepperpot: _No, do you?

_StarkArc: _Not the foggiest o_O

_Pepperpot: _sigh He's never going to learn to come to a meeting prepared is he?

_StarkArc: _Nope.

_BlackWidow: _Hey guys, do you know what Mr Crap-it is on about?

_Pepperpot: _Not you too!

_BlackWidow: _?

_Pepperpot: _It's CRADIT! C-R-A-D-I-T

_StarkArc: _Even though he is seriously crapping this presentation up?

_Pepperpot: _I stand corrected.

_BlackWidow: _Oh no.

_Pepperpot: _Now what?

_BlackWidow: _Coulson and Fury have discovered the x-box.

_StarkArc: _Are they STILL at it?

_BlackWidow: _Yep.

_Pepperpot: _How long?

_StarkArc: _What time did I leave this morning?

_Pepperpot: _Half 7? But that was 7 hours ago!

_StarkArc: _Plus the 3 hours when everyone else was in bed.

_Pepperpot: _Oh dear.

_StarkArc: _What're they playing?

_BlackWidow: _Something called COD.

_Pepperpot: _COD? That's a fish not a franchise surely.

_StarkArc: _Call of Duty, Peps. Rhodey is totally obsessed.

_Pepperpot: _And you?

_StarkArc: _Meh. I prefer Wii Mario Brothers :)

_BlackWidow: _Win.

_StarkArc: _Yep :)

_Pepperpot: _facepalm

_BlackWidow: _Oooooh I felt that.

_StarkArc: _OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

_Pepperpot: _(makes noise of sympathy)

**ColonelCool had just signed in**

_ColonelCool: _Why is everyone offering Tony sympathy?

_StarkArc: _McKensie just owned me in the leg.

_ColonelCool: _Well your cast is huge, man; I mean it just generally gets in the way!

_StarkArc: _Thanks mate that's lovely!

_Pepperpot: _I thought you were doing a training exercise at Edwards?

_ColonelCool: _I just did it; I am now annoying you guys.

_Pepperpot: _Thanks Rhodey.

_ColonelCool: _No problem :)

_BlackWidow: _You okay, Tony? You look like you're about to throw up.

_StarkArc: _I feel like it too. That really hurt quite a bit.

_Pepperpot: _(offers virtual hug) Well if it's any consolation you made Marley jump sky high with your eloquent 'OWWWWWWW!'

_StarkArc: _Yeah that was fun :)

_BlackWidow: _Lols.

_ColonelCool: _I'm hungry.

_StarkArc: _Same, how much longer have we got?

_Pepperpot: _5 minutes.

_StarkArc: _Excellent, where are you now Rhodey?

_ColonelCool: _I'm driving to LA.

_StarkArc: _Great, meet you at that coffee bar next to Target?

_Pepperpot: _I love how you use other shops to figure out where places are.

_StarkArc: _(blows a raspberry)

_ColonelCool: _I'll be there in 10, see you guys!

_Pepperpot: _Bye Rhodes.

**BlackWidow changed her status to 'In A State Of Shock.'**

_StarkArc: _?

_BlackWidow: _Tony just ORGANISED SOMETHING!

_Pepperpot: _Lols :)


	5. Chapter 5

_I've just spent the evening watching Iron Man 2 with my family and my German friend, who didn't understand most of it but laughed in the right places :)_

_If you HAVEN'T seen Michael Bublé live, SEE HIM NOW! HE IS AMAZING! :D_

_This is also bringing in characters from my other story, 'The Avenger Initiative,' please read and review that too!_

_This is a birthday present for Queen Nightshade de Freak, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!_

_Please review!_

**StarkArc has just signed in**

_StarkArc: _GUESS WHAT JUST ARRIVE IN THE POST? :D

_Pepperpot: _What?

_StarkArc: _MICHAEL BUBLÉ CRAZY LOVE HOLLYWOOD EDITION!

_Pepperpot: _?

_TooHotToHandle: _o_O

_WebSwinger: _What a great artist :)

_Pepperpot: _Did you order that?

_StarkArc: _No, but I'm glad its turned up even though it probably isn't mine :)

_WebSwinger: _Unless someone sent it to you?

_StarkArc: _I am indebted to them, Michael Bublé rocks!

_Pepperpot: _Did you know he's playing in New York this weekend?

_StarkArc:_ GET TICKETS!

_Pepperpot:_ He's probably sold out!

_StarkArc:_ GET BACKSTAGE PASSES!

_Pepperpot:_ On it :)

_StarkArc:_ If anyone else wants to come they must speak their mind now.

**SprintStart has just signed in**

_SprintStart: _I WANT TO COME!

_StarkArc: _Oh hey Bess!

_SprintStart: _If you are going to see Michael Bublé then I demand a ticket! Or even better a backstage pass!

_StarkArc: _Pepper?

_Pepperpot: _On it!

_RossBetty: _I WANT TO COME!

_StarkArc: _Pepper?

_Pepperpot: _On it!

_WebSwinger: _Me too!

_StarkArc: _Pepper?

_Pepperpot: _On it!

_SprintStart: _HOLY…!

_StarkArc: _Still there?

_SprintStart: _Yep, Aaron just APPEARED OUT OF NOWHERE IN MY FLAT!

_WebSwinger: _He does that!

_Pepperpot: _Okay, 5 backstage passes booked for me, Tony, Bessie, Betty and Pete.

_StarkArc: _(virtual hugs Pepper)

_SprintStart: (literally runs over to Cali to hug Pepper)_

**SprintStart has changed her status to 'Running To California With Her Laptop To Hug Pepper And Carry On Typing At The Same Time.'**

_StarkArc: _Now THAT'S multitasking :)

_Pepperpot: _Oh hi Bessie!

_SprintStart: _Hi Pepper!

_StarkArc: _Are you two sat next to each other and typing instead of talking again?

_Pepperpot: _Well you're downstairs doing exactly the same thing!

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'Moving Upstairs To Sit Next To Bessie And Pepper Even Though He'll Just Carry On Typing.'**

_StarkArc: _Hi Pepper!

_Pepperpot: _Hi Tony!

* * *

**Tony Stark 'IS GOING TO SEE MICHAEL BUBL!'**

_**13 people like this**_

_**Bessie Sprint commented on Tony Stark's status.**_

Bessie Sprint: Can't wait! He's going to be amazing! I hope he sings either Hollywood or Feeling Good.

_**Tony Stark likes this**_


	6. Chapter 6

_I'm sorry I haven't updated for AGES but I have had LOADS of revision for exams to do so I can get into university which also unfortunately include retakes :P I'll get round to updating 'Pepper For Your Thoughts' at some point as well :) _

_If you review I'll write more!_

_Disclaimer: Sorry officer? That noise? Oh I just have Tony Stark locked in my basement. Do I have copyright? Oh no I don't own him, but I'd like to, hence why he's locked in my basement, don't worry though, it's perfectly clean._

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'Falling Asleep'**

**Pepperpot has changed her status to 'Buzzing Tony'**

_StarkArc: _YEOUCH!

_Pepperpot: _:)

_StarkArc:_ WHAT WAS THAT FOR?

_Pepperpot:_ You were the one falling asleep.

_Wolvie:_ What did she do?

_TooHotToHandle:_ Think carefully before answering that, we may not want to know.

_StarkArc:_ She hand-buzzed me!

BUT IT WASN'T IN MY HAND.

_WebSwinger:_ XO

_TooHotToHandle:_ Wait… she hand-buzzed your…?

_StarkArc:_ Use your imagination, Johnny.

_TooHotToHandle:_ XO

_WebSwinger:_ Pepper you're hard-core

**Pepperpot has changed her status to 'Epically Lol-ing'**

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'Wishing The Ground Would Open Up And Swallow Him Whole'**

_Wolvie:_ Share with the group.

_Pepperpot:_ Bernard just asked Tony a question…

_WebSwinger:_ Wait; are you IM-ing in ANOTHER meeting? I swear that's all you guys do!

_Pepperpot:_ Trust me, if you had to hear this guy, you would be too.

_Wolvie:_ And that's Professional Pepper talking so he must be boring.

_Pepperpot:_ Anyway, because I just zapped Tony's… um… family jewels; he answered the question in a really REALLY high pitched voice.

_StarkArc:_ ¬.¬

_Wolvie:_ HOW high pitched?

_StarkArc:_ Think Teletubbies x 1000.

_WebSwinger:_ OOOOOOHHHHH

_StarkArc:_ Yep :(

_Pepperpot:_ :)

_WebSwinger:_ It could be worse?

_StarkArc:_ HOW COULD IT BE WORSE

_WebSwinger:_ You could be being eaten by a shark.

_Wolvie:_ o.O

_WebSwinger:_ What?

_Wolvie:_ You always take it to the extremes.

_StarkArc:_ Being eaten by a shark wouldn't actually be such a bad thing to be honest.

_Wolvie:_ ?

_StarkArc:_ At least I would have some women crying over my dead body rather than laughing at my very much alive-but-wishing-I-was-invisible body.

**Pepperpot has changed her status to 'Nudging Tony'**

_Wolvie:_ Not again?

_WebSwinger:_ Leave the poor guy alone!

_Pepperpot:_ Oh gosh Tony I'm so sorry!

_StarkArc:_

_WebSwinger:_ o.O

_StarkArc:_

_WebSwinger:_ Is that 'wow' (in which case we don't want to know) or 'ow' (in which case we do.

_StarkArc:_ IT WAS OW YOU MORON

_WebSwinger:_ Ouch, Pepper what did you do?

_Pepperpot:_ I MAY have accidentally…

_StarkArc:_ Accidentally my arse

_Pepperpot:_ …got him in the leg.

_TooHotToHandle:_ Ooooooh ouch

_Wolvie:_ You know it's not going to get any better if people keep smacking it.

_Pepperpot:_ You should see Bernard's face! Complete shock! I reckon everyone in here thinks I'm torturing him :P

_StarkArc:_ YOU ARE!

_Pepperpot:_ Could you please NOT look like you're in agony?

_StarkArc:_ I AM IN AGONY!

_Pepperpot:_ Well everyone is giving you odd looks!

_StarkArc:_ That's because I'm half-way off the chair!

_Pepperpot:_ I'm really really sorry Tony :'(

_StarkArc:_ Uh… Pep?

_Pepperpot:_ Yes honey?

_StarkArc:_ I think I'm going to…

_Wolvie:_ ?

_Pepperpot:_ He faceplanted the floor.

_TooHotToHandle:_ Oh he is SO going to get ribbed for that one.

* * *

Tony Stark Q: On an embarrassment level (1 being not embarrassing 10 being bright red face) how would today score?

A: This takes it all the way up to 11

Via Formspring

_Please review!_


	7. Chapter 7

_This chapter is dedicated to my big little brother (he's taller than me but younger than me), because he got off the Xbox to proof-read it for me. That's something that doesn't happen often! _

_ENJOY!_

_StarkArc: _I really wish Johnston would stop farting

_Pepperpot: _(wafts hand in direction of window)

_ColonelCool: _What has he been eating?

_StarkArc: _Something filled with either a) one of the following or more likely b) all of the following: sprouts, greens, beans, curry, broccoli.

_ColonelCool: _Broccoli is the worst.

_Pepperpot: _I'm sorry but I really am going to have to open the window in a minute.

_StarkArc: _Did Caroline just get her inhaler out?

_Pepperpot: _She's asthmatic.

_ColonelCool: _I don't blame her; I think all of the oxygen in this room is slowing being replaced with methane.

_StarkArc: _Silent but deadly.

_Pepperpot: _THAT one wasn't very silent.

_ColonelCool: _I love the colour he's gone XD

_StarkArc: _I think he's going to spontaneously self combust in a minute.

Oooh Lauren beat you to it :)

_Pepperpot: _I really was THIS close to opening the window.

_StarkArc: _Well Lauren is an office ninja.

_Pepperpot: _Really?

_StarkArc: _Yep, all of my staff are office ninjas, you're like the head ninja, and Lauren is your second in command.

_ColonelCool: _You have ninjas running your company? O_o

_StarkArc: _Hell yes, that's why it's so awesome.

_Pepperpot: _Why is Lauren a ninja?

_StarkArc: _Have you seen just how fast she gets photocopies done? That's ninja.

**SonnyLauren has 1 unread message from StarkTony**

**Subject: Ninjas**

Hey Lauren? You're a ninja.

Tony.

**StarkTony has 1 unread message from SonnyLauren**

**Subject: RE: Ninjas**

You bet your ass I am.

Lauren

_ColonelCool: _I'm starting to wonder why I'm even in this stupid meeting.

_StarkArc: _Me too…

_Pepperpot: _I've been wondering that all morning o_O

You know how we're always going on about how the other CEOs have their flies down?

_StarkArc: _Wait… do they have THE TWEENIES ON THEM?

_Pepperpot: _Tony! Stop laughing! Everyone's staring!

Rhodey you too!

**SonnyLauren has just signed in**

_SonnyLauren: _Have you seen his boxers?

I'm guessing yes by the increase in laughter.

_Pepperpot: _(facepalm)

_StarkArc: _I'm really trying to stop but what's making it funnier is that everyone's staring at us like we're totally insane.

Where did Lauren come from? TOLD YOU SHE WAS A NINJA.

_Pepperpot: _STOP LAUGHING!

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'ROFLMFAO'**

**ColonelCool has changed his status to 'Same as Tony'**

**Pepperpot has changed her status to 'Google-ing What ROFLMFAO Means'**

_StarkArc: _You really don't know?

_Pepperpot: _ Well I do now.

Seriously, if you don't stop laughing I'm going to key the Audi.

_StarkArc: _You've been threatening to do that for years.

_Pepperpot: _Well now I actually will.

_ColonelCool: _She looks deadly serious.

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'Not Laughing'**

_Pepperpot: _Thank you, and now you're going to have to come up with a really good reason as to why you were laughing in the first place.

SERIOUSLY? THAT'S THE BEST YOU COULD COME UP WITH?

**WebSwinger has just signed in**

_WebSwinger: _Just a quick question, have you seen my Spideysuit?

_StarkArc: _Uh… I think Betty put it in the wash.

_WebSwinger: _OH MAN! It's so going to shrink :(

**WebSwinger has changed his status to 'Scrolling Up'**

Um… what excuse did you give?

_Pepperpot: _He told everyone that his was on laughing gas because of the pain in his leg.

_WebSwinger: _ROFLMAO

_ColonelCool: _The worrying this is it works….

_StarkArc: _I thought I nailed it actually.

_WebSwinger: _Wasn't Rhodey laughing too?

_Pepperpot: _His excuse for THAT was that Rhodey had eaten 5 boxes of Smarties, 3 bars of Mars Bars, 10 cans of Fanta and is now on a sugar high.

_StarkArc: _That worked too.

_WebSwinger: _Not bad :) I gotta go, see you all later!

**WebSwinger has signed out.**

_StarkArc: _And WHOOSH just like that he's gone. I think Pete is a ninja too.

_Pepperpot: _(facepalm)


	8. Chapter 8

_Sorry I haven't updated FOREVER! I have loads of different reasons but I won't bore you with them right now. So here's chapter 8 which has been sitting on my hard-drive, covered in dust and half finished for A WHOLE YEAR. Read and review! And thank you to everyone who pestered me to get this chapter up, you all get cookies :) And the beginning was actually a sketch on Dead Ringers which I was listening to when I first started writing this A WHOLE YEAR AGO. And for everyone who doesn't know who 'The Doctor' is, YOU SHOULD DO. And I brought in a character from my other story 'The Avenger Initiative,' so please go and read that too :)_

**StarkArc has just signed in**

_StarkArc: _Hey Pep?

_Pepperpot: _Hey Tony?

_StarkArc: _Does the hotel room have any plug sockets in it?

_Pepperpot: _Yes…

_StarkArc: _Does it have enough to charge a lightsaber?

_Pepperpot: _I'm fairly certain they'll have to confiscate all lightsabers on arrival.

_StarkArc: _Bugger.

_Pepperpot: _You're going to have a police escort with you as well.

_StarkArc: _Oh I meant to talk to you about that.

_Pepperpot: _What?

_WebSwinger: _I so know what's coming next.

_StarkArc: _I don't need a police escort, the force is with me.

_Pepperpot: _I'll let them know :)

_WebSwinger: _You two have been listening to Dead Ringers haven't you?

_Pepperpot: _Yes.

_StarkArc: _Yes we have, actually we are right now.

_WebSwinger: _I love that program.

Wait… are you in the same room again?

_Pepperpot: _Yep.

_WebSwinger: _Is the Doctor on yet?

_Pepperpot: _He didn't come on this show! :(

_StarkArc: _:'(

_WebSwinger: _LET DOWN.

_StarkArc: _ I KNOW! I'm really sad now :(

_Pepperpot: _:'(

**BlackWidow has just signed in**

_BlackWidow: _What're y'all doing this evening?

_StarkArc: _Are you turning into Will Smith, Natashalie?

_BlackWidow: _Yep, I just saw Men in Black.

AND IT'S NATASHA.

_StarkArc: _… (alie)

_BlackWidow: _¬.¬

**EpicShield has just signed in**

_EpicShield: _FEAR NOT CITIZENS.

**StarkArc has blocked keyboard control for EpicShield**

_BlackWidow: _AGAIN?

_StarkArc: _Until he learns!

_Pepperpot: _:)

**HulkSmash has just signed in**

_HulkSmash: _Does anyone know why the bathroom light is currently in pieces on the bathroom floor?

_StarkArc: _o_O

_Pepperpot: _Oh that was Betty.

_HulkSmash: _MY Betty?

_Pepperpot: _That's the one; she had a fight with it and lost.

_StarkArc: _Like you did with that door?

_Pepperpot: _¬.¬

_HulkSmash: _Why did she have an argument with it?

_Pepperpot: _She got annoyed when she bashed her head on it while putting a shirt on this morning and threw a brand new bottle of shampoo at it.

_StarkArc: _Brand new bottle= very heavy :)

_WebSwinger: _Aw did you work that out all by yourself? Now I know why they call you a genius.

_StarkArc: _¬.¬

_Pepperpot: _Um… yeah… Anyway, Tony's and Pete's immature comments aside, the bottle smashed into the light and it basically exploded everywhere.

_HulkSmash: _Wow, she must have been _pissed._

_Pepperpot: _She really was.

_StarkArc: _Was she as pissed as that time when Reed threw toast at her?

_Pepperpot: _MORE so.

_StarkArc: _Whoa o_O

_HulkSmash: _Reed threw toast at her?

_StarkArc: _Yeah, it was ages ago though.

_HulkSmash: _WHY did he throw toast at her?

_Pepperpot: _He didn't ACTUALLY throw toast at her, the TOASTER threw toast at her but it was Reed's toast so she blamed him.

_HulkSmash: _Oh was that the manic toaster!

**SprintStart has just signed in**

_SprintStart: _What are we talking about? Oh was this the toaster I put a safety net around?

_HulkSmash: _A SAFETY NET?

_SprintStart: _Yeah, so it caught the toast in the net rather than just chuck it at the nearest person.

_HulkSmash: _Oh! That one! Isn't that the one Tony programmed to say 'hey would you like some toast?'

_StarkArc: _Yep that's the one :D

_Pepperpot: _What happened to that toaster?

_SprintStart: _I think someone threw it out :'(

_StarkArc: _Don't worry, I can easily program the new one to do the same :)

_SprintStart: _:D

_HulkSmash: _Where's that from anyway?

_StarkArc: _RED DWARF, OBVIOUSLY.

_HulkSmash: _Oh haha very amusing, now where did it REALLY come from?

_StarkArc: _I just told you!

_Pepperpot: _I _think _he's under the impression that we're talking about an exploding star…

_HulkSmash: _Well that's what a Red Dwarf is, isn't it! It's an exploding star!

_StarkArc: _ACTUALLY it's a very low-mass star with no more than 40% of the mass of the Sun. Consequently they have relatively low temperatures in their cores and energy is generated at a slow rate through nuclear fusion of hydrogen into helium by the proton-proton (PP) chain mechanism. Thus these stars emit little light, sometimes as little as 1/10,000th that of the Sun. Even the largest red dwarfs (for example HD 179930, HIP 12961 and Lacaille 8760) have only about 10% of the Sun's luminosity.

_HulkSmash: _Okay… o_O

_StarkArc: _(sigh) Just YouTube 'Red Dwarf, Talkie Toaster.'

_HulkSmash: _Will do.

_Pepperpot: _I didn't know you were such a star expert Tony o_O

_StarkArc: _I'm a star expert on everything!

_Pepperpot: _You know what I mean .

_StarkArc: _Yeah well, when I was 5 I had a poster on my wall.

_SprintStart: _It always starts with a poster.

_StarkArc: _Yes, yes it does :)


	9. Chapter 9

_I GOT INTO UNIVERSITY! YES! :D :D :D :D So here is a chapter for all of you lovely people :) If any of you have also just come out of 6__th__ Form or college I hope you all did ridiculously well, this chapter is a present to all of you :) Please review! I will update soon, pinkie promise! This actually happened to me yesterday. I went out for a walk with my dad, brother and granddad without a coat and the heavens opened. We all got ever so slightly totally soaked. Especially my dad, who didn't even have a jumper or anything. Honestly. Men._

**StarkArc has just signed in**

_StarkArc:_ PEPPER I GOT WET.

_Pepperpot:_ THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S RAINING AND YOU DIDN'T TAKE A COAT WITH YOU.

_StarkArc:_ :(

_Pepperpot:_ How wet did you get?

_EpicShield:_ TOTALLY SOAKED.

_Pepperpot:_ You both went out?

_StarkArc:_ StupidFurymumblegrumble

_BlackWidow:_ It's your own stupid fault for going out in the pouring rain without a coat.

_EpicShield:_ WE DON'T NEED COATS.

_StarkArc:_ WE'RE MEN.

_Pepperpot:_ You're idiots.

_ManWithThePatch:_ You did complete the mission right?

_StarkArc:_ ¬.¬

_EpicShield:_ ¬.¬

_ManWithThePatch:_ Well?

_StarkArc:_ ¬.¬

_EpicShield:_ ¬.¬

_BlackWidow:_ Yes, they did, they're just not talking to you.

_StarkArc:_ ¬.¬

_EpicShield:_ ¬.¬

_ManWithThePatch:_ Look, it's your own stupid fault for not taking your coats with you.

_StarkArc:_ ¬.¬

_EpicShield:_ ¬.¬

_ManWithThePatch:_ Just make sure you have your report on my desk by 6pm this evening.

_StarkArc:_ ¬.¬

_EpicShield:_ ¬.¬

_ManWithThePatch:_ I'm going now.

**ManWithThePatch has signed off**

_StarkArc:_ ACHOOOO!

_TooHotToHandle:_ That made me jump!

_EpicShield:_ ACHOOO!

_HulkSmash:_ That made _me _jump.

_Pepperpot:_ Tony, if you get a cold because you didn't take a coat with you I swear I will still make you go to the R&D meeting tomorrow.

_StarkArc:_ I'm dying Pepper!

_Pepperpot:_ Man flu!

_BlackWidow:_ Sing it sister!

_StarkArc:_ Oh please.

_EpicShield:_ What is this 'man flu' you speak of?

_Pepperpot:_ When blokes get ill they act like they're dying, unless you're Tony Stark of course, then it works in reverse. When you _are _dying you act like you're fine.

_StarkArc:_ I said sorry about that!

_Pepperpot:_ Just don't do it again okay?

_StarkArc:_ Do I still have to go to the R&D meeting?

_Pepperpot:_ Yes you do.

_StarkArc:_ You're breaking my heart :(

_Pepperpot:_ I'll buy you a cheesecake.

_StarkArc:_ That is a suitable compromise; it has to be a big one though.

_Pepperpot:_ Okay, one big cheesecake coming up :)

_StarkArc:_ :) ACHOOO!

_Pepperpot:_ Oh dear.

_BlackWidow:_ How did you get there with that leg of yours?

_StarkArc:_ Pimped out crutches.

_EpicShield:_ It was actually pretty pimped out.

_Pepperpot:_ What did you do to it?

_StarkArc:_ I painted it red and gold and covered it in car stickers, it looked awesome.

_HulkSmash:_ I missed all of this, what were they doing?

_StarkArc:_ Stalking Hammer in the pouring rain.

_HulkSmash:_ I thought he was supposed to be in prison?

_Pepperpot:_ He's rich, he bought his way out.

_EpicShield:_ _WHY _he asked Hop-a-long to come with me I really don't know…

_StarkArc:_ He wanted to kill me.

_BlackWidow:_ That's possible actually.

_TooHotToHandle:_ Movie night this evening guys?

**DeathOnABike has just signed in**

_DeathOnABike:_ Have I missed anything exciting?

_Pepperpot:_ Fury tried to kill Tony and Steve.

_DeathOnABike:_ Ho-hum, what's new :) How's the leg?

_StarkArc:_ Ridiculously painful. I'm going to take some Paracetamol and pass out on the sofa for a few hours.

_HulkSmash:_ As painkillers go that's not very powerful.

_StarkArc:_ It's all we have left in the cupboard! Pete used the rest when he was thrown through that window last week.

_WebSwinger:_ That was also ridiculously painful.

_BlackWidow:_ Anyway, I like this movie night idea, I still haven't seen The Boat That Rocked?

_HulkSmash:_ That's the best movie in existence.

_Pepperpot:_ Yep, sounds good to me.

_DeathOnABike:_ I'm in.

_WebSwinger:_ Me too.

_EpicShield:_ Yep, count me in.

_BlackWidow:_ Groovy. Tony?

Tony?

OI STARK!

_Pepperpot:_ He's passed out on the sofa, but he'll want to watch it too.

_HulkSmash:_ Are you sat next to each other AGAIN?

_Pepperpot:_ Yes, this has become a daily occurrence. I'm wasting my life.

_BlackWidow:_ Awesome, if you're not already there, meet up at Avenger's base at 8pm?

_HulkSmash:_ I'll bring the popcorn.

_EpicShield:_ Plan. I'm gonna go take a shower.

**EpicShield has just signed out.**

_WebSwinger:_ Has anyone noticed that Steve and Johnny S look REALLY familiar?

_Pepperpot:_ o_O

_BlackWidow:_ Oh. My. God. I hadn't noticed!

_HulkSmash:_ o_O

* * *

_On that bombshell..._

_Please review!_


	10. Chapter 10

_Sorry I haven't updated in forever! I've been at uni, then I got fresher's flu, then I've been on my hospital placement, then I got fresher's flu AGAIN. Life isn't being fair to me in terms of illness :P Anyway, here is Chapter 10, for your viewing pleasure :) Enjoy and then review! :)_

_Also, for some daft reason I've joined tumblr :P There's a link to it on my profile under homepage, feel free to stalk! I've posted LOADS of Avengers/Iron man pictures up :)_

_StarkArc: _Heyyyyyyy Lyla!

_BettyRoss: _None of us are called Lyla…

_StarkArc: _It's playing on the radio :)

_EpicShield: _I don't understand this new music, it makes no sense.

_WebSwinger: _I can understand that.

_EpicShield: _For example, how do you bluff with a muffin?

_StarkArc: _I'm not answering that.

_WebSwinger: _That goes for me too.

_Pepperpot: _Why is there a half-finished bookcase in the hallway?

_BlackWidow: _That's Steve's fault.

_BettyRoss: _What's Steve's fault?

_BlackWidow: _He was trying to show off how strong he is by screwing nails in and he threaded one of them.

_WebSwinger: _Threaded?

_BlackWidow: _He wore down the metal around the screw top so the screwdriver won't turn it to screw it in.

_BettyRoss: _Whoops :)

_StarkArc: _Bruce was going to get some bagels so I asked him to get another screw.

_Hammered: _Fear not puny mortals! The Son of Odin is here!

_StarkArc: _o_O

_BettyRoss: _Oh. My. God.

_Pepperpot: _Thor got instant messaging.

_StarkArc: _o_O There is hope for the world.

**BlackWidow has just signed in**

_BlackWidow: _And the best you could come up with was 'Hammered?'

_Hammered: _I'm working on it.

_StarkArc: _And I thought 'Fear not citizens!' was bad :P

_EpicShield: _I have stopped doing that.

_BlackWidow: _Only because Tony kept blocking your user controls.

_EpicShield: _True…

_StarkArc: _So I just tripped over the massive unfinished bookcase currently residing on the floor and while I was lying on the hallway in agony having hit my leg I noticed something of vital importance.

_EpicShield: _?

_StarkArc: _You were using the wrong screwdriver…

_EpicShield: _…

_StarkArc: _That's why you couldn't get the screw in…

_BlackWidow: _XD LOLS

_Pepperpot: _XD

_BettyRoss: _XD ROFLMAO

_WebSwinger: _Trust the women to find that amusing.

_Pepperpot: _You try so hard to be macho :)

_BettyRoss: _And fail so bad.

_StarkArc: _:(

_Pepperpot: _With the exception of Tony, who brought me breakfast in bed this morning.

_EpicShield: _Because of course, that's the definition of 'macho.' Wait… what does macho actually mean?

_StarkArc: _I didn't burn the toast!

_Pepperpot: _For the first time ever :)

_StarkArc: _Fine, no more breakfast in bed for you then!

Actually no I don't mean that, I love you too much, even though you're mean to me :'(

_Pepperpot: _You know fully well I was very grateful ;)

_BettyRoss: _Since when did Pepper get so promiscuous?

_WebSwinger: _Since she started dating Tony apparently.

_StarkArc: _I'm a bad influence.

_WebSwinger: _That you are.

**Hawkeye has just signed in**

_BlackWidow: _Oh wow, everyone's getting on here.

_Hawkeye: _Impressed?

_StarkArc: _Thor has outdone you I'm afraid.

_Hawkeye: _Now what's he done?

_WebSwinger: _He's got instant messaging.

_Hawkeye: _:O You guys sure about that?

_StarkArc: _Actually… where's he gone? Goldilocks? You there?

**HulkSmash has just signed in**

_HulkSmash: _He got fed up with the computer informing him he was running low on disk space on drive c so he hit it with Meow-Meow.

_Pepperpot: _Meow-Meow?

_Hawkeye: _It's easier than saying 'Mjolnir.'

_HulkSmash: _Plus none of us can spell it…

_BlackWidow: _Apart from Clint, it seems.

_StarkArc: _Clint can spell everything.

_Hawkeye: _That's very true.

_HulkSmash: _And 'hit' isn't really the right word… pulverised and annihilated are better.

_StarkArc: _. Well that didn't last long.

_EpicShield: _Did you expect it too?

_StarkArc: _Touché.

**Hammered has just signed in**

_BlackWidow: _Please don't annihilate another computer, we need them to send emails and waste time at work by going on IM and making fun of each other.

_Hammered: _I will do my best, maiden.

_Pepperpot: _Do you call everyone 'maiden?'

_Hammered: _Of course, it is polite.

_Hawkeye: _Says the guy who thought throwing a cup on the floor and yelling 'ANOTHER!' was a suitable way getting a refill.

_StarkArc: _:) Plus, no offence Natashalie, but you are the last person I'd refer to as a 'maiden'. A 'ninja' maybe.

_BlackWidow: _No offence taken, Tony. I now want you all to refer to me as 'Black Widow: The Ninja Spider.'

And it's Natasha ¬.¬

And wait, that sounds like a corny move title :P

I'll think of something better.

_StarkArc: _Fixed the bookcase yet?

_EpicShield: _Yep!

_StarkArc: _Yay! Now can you please move it before I fall over it again and crack my head open?

_EpicShield: _If you looked where you were going this wouldn't be an issue.

_BlackWidow: _Tony walks around trying to find the answer to the universe.

_StarkArc: _Found that ages ago, 42.

_BlackWidow: _Boy I walked straight into that one didn't I?

_StarkArc: _Yes you did :)

_EpicShield: _Right, I'm going to go and move this cupboard so Tony doesn't whack his noggin' on it.

_StarkArc: _Hey not bad!

_BlackWidow: _That was a good one :)

_BettyRoss: _What's going on?

_StarkArc: _We're trying to teach Steve slang :)

_WebSwinger: _Why?

_Hawkeye: _For lols mainly.

**EpicShield has just signed off**

_BettyRoss: _Steve seems a bit melancholy today.

_BlackWidow: _It's Peggy's birthday.

_StarkArc: _Ah, that would be the reason.

_Hawkeye: _He must miss her a lot.

_WebSwinger: _I can't imagine it, waking up after nearly 70 years and finding that all your family and friends are dead.

_Pepperpot: _Must be an awful feeling.

_StarkArc: _Well at least Peggy's not dead.

_BlackWidow: _…

Wait, what?

_Hawkeye: _Did you just say Peggy's NOT dead?

_StarkArc: _Yeah, she's very much alive. She's 98.

Doesn't Steve know?

_BlackWidow: _Her SHIELD record says she died in 2003!

_StarkArc: _She's alive and living in Chicago! I saw her a couple of weeks ago when I did that charity benefit thing, she came and found me!

_BlackWidow: _And you're SURE it was her?

_StarkArc: _Positive! I had JARVIS do a ID.

_Pepperpot: _Oh I remember her! I saw you talking to an old lady with red lipstick!

A _lot _of red lipstick.

_BlackWidow: _Very mobile for a 98 year old!

_StarkArc: _She had a wheelchair, but she can walk without it, just not for very long.

_Hawkeye: _Well someone better tell Steve…

* * *

_To be continued…_

_Please review!_


	11. Chapter 11

_Updated! :D This actually happened to me, well the beginning anyway, I was woken up by the guy next door playing porn REALLY LOUDLY at 1 in the morning. It was disturbing. It's not natural for anyone to scream like that._

_Anyway, please review! I love you all :)_

* * *

_Pepperpot: _What is that noise?

_HulkSmash: _I don't know but it doesn't sound legal…

_BlackWidow: _What was THAT noise?

_Pepperpot: _I don't know but that one DEFINITELY wasn't legal.

**StarkArc has just signed in**

_StarkArc: _What are we moaning about now?

_HulkSmash: _That noise.

_StarkArc: _Oh that's just the guy next door playing porn.

_Pepperpot: _o_O

_HulkSmash: _How do you know?

_StarkArc: _Trust me, I know what porn sounds like.

_BlackWidow: _We neither doubt it, nor want to know.

**Hawkeye has just signed in**

_Hawkeye: _Is that Tony and Pepper making that noise?

_StarkArc: _If it is we're obviously very good mulitaskers.

_Pepperpot: _. Why do you immediately assume it's us?

_Hawkeye: _Mainly because of Tony.

_StarkArc: _Charming.

_Pepperpot: _There are 2 other couples here!

_BlackWidow: _Really?

_Pepperpot: _Bruce and Betty, and Coulson and his job.

_HulkSmash: _Pepper made a funny :)

_Pepperpot: _Oh my god.

_StarkArc: _What?

_Pepperpot: _OH. MY. GOD.

_BlackWidow: _WHAT?

_Pepperpot: _PEOPLE ARE SHIPPING TONY AND STEVE.

_StarkArc: _WHAT?

_BlackWidow: _Oh god XD

_StarkArc: _This is no laughing matter!

_Hawkeye: _Tony is the straightest guy on the planet!

_BlackWidow: _HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

_StarkArc: _NATASHALIE!

_HulkSmash: _This is hilarious.

_StarkArc: _How bad is it?

_Pepperpot: _Very. Oh god. There's images on tumblr.

_StarkArc: _My life is over.

**EpicShield has just signed in**

_StarkArc: _I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

_EpicShield: _o_O Okay… to be honest, I'm not mad about doing it with you either.

_StarkArc: _Wonderful, now please tell the world that.

_BlackWidow: _IT'S ON DEVIANTART TOO! XD XD XD

_StarkArc: _I'm going to go jump out the top floor window of Stark Tower, goodbye cruel world.

OW.

OI.

_BlackWidow: _What?

_StarkArc: _PEPPER SAT ON ME.

_Pepperpot: _Yes I did. And I am not moving until you retract that statement.

_BlackWidow: _XD

_Hawkeye: _That's your new favourite smiley isn't it?

_BlackWidow: _Yes it is.

_EpicShield: _Why is Pepper sat on Tony?

_StarkArc: _She still doesn't trust me after the whole 'not telling her I was dying' thing.

_EpicShield: _You were dying?

_StarkArc: _You haven't heard?

_Hawkeye: _You didn't tell Pepper?

_StarkArc: _I have my reasons.

_Pepperpot: _I would love to hear them.

_StarkArc: _It's really hard to type with you sat on me, not that I mind though.

_Pepperpot: _Tell me your reasons.

_StarkArc: _I can't.

_Pepperpot: _Why?

_StarkArc: _Because everyone will go 'EW!' or possibly 'AW'. Actually no, 'EW!' is more likely.

_BlackWidow: _Tell us. Tell us now.

_StarkArc: _You wouldn't be happy with me saying 'I didn't want to die?'

_BlackWidow: _That's an 'AW' response. Now tell us the 'EW!' response.

_StarkArc: _I can't, you'll make fun of me.

_EpicShield: _More than we do already?

_StarkArc: _Yes.

_Pepperpot: _Well I'm not getting off you until you tell me.

**ManWithThePatch has just signed in**

_ManWithThePatch: _I need all of you back at base now, with the exception of Stark, who's leg hasn't healed.

_BlackWidow: _NOW?

_ManWithThePatch: _Problem, Ms Romanoff?

_BlackWidow: _Yes! Tony was about to tell us why he didn't tell Pepper he was dying!

_ManWithThePatch: _He can tell you later. Base. Now.

_Hawkeye: _Grumblegrumble.

_BlackWidow: _We'll be back to tease you later, Shellhead.

_StarkArc: _Looking forward to it.

**BlackWidow has just signed off**

**Hawkeye has just signed off**

**ManWithThePatch has just signed off**

**EpicShield has just signed off**

**HulkSmash has just signed off**

_Pepperpot: _And then there were two.

So?

_StarkArc: _So what?

_Pepperpot: _Don't try it. I want you to tell me why you didn't tell me you were dying.

_StarkArc: _Okay, but I warn you now, you brought it on yourself.

_Pepperpot: _Understood.

_StarkArc: _Okay, here we go.

I didn't want to tell you I was dying because I would have had to tell you I loved you and I would have started crying and you would have freaked out and left and I didn't want you to leave me when I needed you more then I've ever needed anyone else in the entire world ever.

_Pepperpot: _Oh Tony :) I would never ever have left you.

_BlackWidow: _AW!

_Hawkeye: _EW!

_EpicShield: _AW!

_HulkSmash: _EW!

_StarkArc: _YOU BASTARDS.

_Pepperpot: _How did you do that?

_BlackWidow: _I'm very good at covering my tracks.

_Pepperpot: _So how did you do that?

_BlackWidow: _I used a computer code to make it look like we'd all logged off :)

_StarkArc: _The irony being I taught her how to do that.

_BlackWidow: _Yes you did.

Also, that was the most adorable thing you have ever said ever.

Anyway, bye :)

**BlackWidow has just signed off**

**RossBetty has just signed in**

_RossBetty: _Why are Tony and Pepper making out on the sofa?

_HulkSmash: _Because they're madly in love, it's gross.

_Hawkeye: _See? He's definitely not gay.

* * *

_Please review lovely people! :)_


	12. Chapter 12

_Updated! :D And I am so freaking excited about Christmas! I decorated my uni room today and my housemate walked in and said it looked like Santa's grotto :) And my other housemate and I are going Christmas shopping together and we're going to toy shops which I haven't done in AGES so I am mega excited :D :D_

_Anyway, there is a bit of angst at the end but I've already written most of the next chapter and it's a lot happier :)_

_Let me know if you want a Christmas special!_

_Please review you lovely people! :)_

**HulkSmash has just signed in**

_HulkSmash: _What's up with Tony?

_Pepperpot: _Huh?

_HulkSmash: _He's crashed out on the coach making strange noises o_O

_Pepperpot: _o_O

_BlackWidow: _He was having a nightmare, I just woke him up and he jumped back and flipped over the side of the sofa.

_HulkSmash: _Man I wish I'd been there to see that.

**StarkArc has just signed in**

_StarkArc: _Gosh guys thanks for caring.

_Pepperpot: _I care! Bruce just wasn't clear.

_HulkSmash: _I was too!

_Pepperpot: _Making strange noises? Tony's always making strange noises.

_StarkArc: _Gosh thanks Pepper.

_HulkSmash: _You're saying 'gosh' a lot today.

_StarkArc:_ I've said it twice! And I'm in a 'gosh' mood.

_Pepperpot: _He's always grumpy when he wakes up.

_StarkArc: _¬.¬

_Pepperpot: _You are! Remember that time in a R&D meeting where you fell asleep, woke up and glared at Johnson for ten minutes?

_HulkSmash: _You fell asleep in a meeting?

_Pepperpot: _I did too.

_BlackWidow: _o_O

_Pepperpot: _Johnson is very _very _boring.

_StarkArc: _Extremely boring. His favourite topic is toast.

_BlackWidow: _Really?

_StarkArc: _Yep. He once cornered me and gave me a ten minute lecture on the merits of toast. It was at that point I mastered the art of sleeping with my eyes open.

_Pepperpot: _He's not joking. He was stood there drooling.

_StarkArc: _I was not drooling!

_Pepperpot: _You were a little, Johnson didn't even notice, I had to nudge you or you would have stood there drooling all day.

_StarkArc: _:)

_BlackWidow: _What's that noise?

_HulkSmash: _Next door having sex again?

_BlackWidow: _Other side of the wall.

_StarkArc: _Is that… Steve…?

**WebSwinger has just signed in**

_WebSwinger: _Steve is making an odd noise…

_BlackWidow: _A very odd noise…

**EpicShield has just signed in**

_EpicShield: _It's not what you think.

_StarkArc: _I'm sure I have no idea what you mean.

_BlackWidow: _Nope, we have no idea what you're talking about.

_HulkSmash: _At all.

_Pepperpot: _Not a clue.

_EpicShield: _You do know I can scroll up and see what you've been writing, right?

_StarkArc: _Ah.

_BlackWidow: _So what *were* you doing?

_EpicShield: Someone _(mentioning no names *cough* *Tony* *cough*) has programmed my radio to only play porn non-stop on full volume without letting you turn it down or off.

_HulkSmash: _It's off now.

_EpicShield: _I threw it at the wall.

_Pepperpot: _Tony!

_StarkArc: _What? It wasn't me!

_BlackWidow: _You really expect us to believe that?

_StarkArc: _I haven't been here I've been at SI!

_WebSwinger: _And I was here when he got back and he just collapsed on the sofa and stopped moving.

_StarkArc: _Thank you, Peter.

_BlackWidow: _Who was it then?

_StarkArc: _If you wasn't me who do you _think _was it.

_BlackWidow: _BARTON!

_WebSwinger: _Bloody hell you shouted that loudly!

_BlackWidow: _I'm very good at shouting.

_StarkArc: _Trust me, we've noticed.

**Hawkeye has just signed in**

_Hawkeye: _ROMANOFF!

_BlackWidow: _Did you by any chance program Steve's radio to only play porn?

_Hawkeye: _That was Tony.

_StarkArc: _If you scroll up you'll see we've already gone over this.

_Hawkeye: _Ah.

It was Fury.

_Pepperpot: _Because that's believable.

_Hawkeye: _I thought so too :)

_WebSwinger: _My head hurts.

_StarkArc: _I'm not surprised!

_BlackWidow: _Sozzer :(

**Hammered has just signed in**

_Hammered: _jdgfhsjv648234v

**Hammered has just signed off**

_StarkArc: _Well that was enlightening.

_BlackWidow: _He's still getting to grips with how to use the computer.

_StarkArc: _He was using it fine last week!

_BlackWidow: _I think he might also be slightly drunk.

_StarkArc: _o_O is it possible to get Thor drunk on our humble booze?

_WebSwinger: _Apparently it is when he drinks _everything _in the liquor cabinet.

_Pepperpot: _There was a _lot _of liquor in there o_O

_EpicShield: _Why is he trying to get drunk?

_HulkSmash: _He says water tastes too bland and needs more fizz.

_StarkArc: _That's why sparkling soda was invented.

_HulkSmash: _Apparently that's not fizzy enough either.

_BlackWidow: _WHAT THE DUCK WAS THAT NOISE?

_StarkArc: _Did you seriously just say 'duck'?

_BlackWidow: _I'm trying to be polite.

_Hawkeye: _That was the sound of a drunken Thor tripping over the table and sending everything including himself crashing to the floor.

_StarkArc: _o_O whoops.

_BlackWidow: _I'm going to murder him.

_StarkArc: _Did I mention my leg is really quite painful today?

_Pepperpot: _Actually you haven't.

_StarkArc: _Well it is.

OMG JUST GOT A EMAIL FROM MY COUSIN IN ITALY SHE'S COMING OVER AT CHRISTMAS! :D :D

_Pepperpot: _You _hate _Christmas.

_StarkArc: _But I _love _my cousin.

_BlackWidow: _OMG Tony is being affectionate.

_StarkArc: _I'm always affectionate towards Pepper! And my cousin is awesome, and she's bringing her mini-me with her.

_BlackWidow: _Mini-me?

_StarkArc: _My god-daughter Faye, she's 5 and totally adorable.

_Pepperpot: _You have a god-daughter!

_StarkArc: _Yep.

_Pepperpot: _You kept that one quiet!

_StarkArc: _Remember when I went to Venice 5 years ago for that weekend? I went to her christening! Isabella asked me to be her godfather then :)

_BlackWidow: _Isabella?

_StarkArc: _My cousin's name, she was my partner in crime when we were kids :)

Oh crap she'll probably tell you loads of embarrassing stories :P

_Hawkeye: _Yay embarrassing stories! :D

_EpicShield: _Wait, you hate Christmas?

_StarkArc: _Hate is such a strong word.

_Pepperpot: _He's warming to it.

_StarkArc: _I'm gonna get in the shower, bye-bye!

**StarkArc has just signed off.**

_EpicShield: _Why does Tony hate Christmas?

_BlackWidow: _His parents died at Christmas.

_Pepperpot: _December 24th at 3 in the morning. For the ten years I've worked for him he drinks himself into a stupor on Christmas Day.

_BlackWidow: _Until last year that is.

_EpicShield: _What happened last year?

_BlackWidow: _A Pepper-Vention took place :)

_Pepperpot: _Yes it did.

_EpicShield: _I've been meaning to ask but don't know how, was Tony there in the car crash or was he at home?

_Pepperpot: _There has been a lot of conflicting stories about that.

_BlackWidow: _He was in the car with his parents, sat in the back behind the passenger seat.

_HulkSmash: _Did you know, Pepper?

_Pepperpot: _He got slightly drunk and slurred it out to me ages ago. Plus he has a tiny scar on his forehead, it's hidden behind his hair and if you try to mention it he changes the subject really fast.

_EpicShield: _Poor guy, why did the car crash?

_BlackWidow: _That we don't know.

_Pepperpot: _No idea, I don't like to bring it up it really upsets him.

_Hawkeye: _I've never seen him upset.

_Pepperpot: _He's really good at hiding it.

_HulkSmash: _I'm actually looking forward to meeting his cousin.

_BlackWidow: _Does she know anything about it?

_Pepperpot: _I don't know, he has mentioned her just not very often.

_EpicShield: _I can't imagine what it must feel like to be stuck in the back of a car with your two dead parents in front.

_Pepperpot: _He said at the press conference he never got to say goodbye to Howard, it makes me wonder if he got to say goodbye to Maria?

_BlackWidow: _I thought that too. He was closer to her than Howard.

_EpicShield: _Howard was a great guy! I can't see why they didn't get along?

_Pepperpot: _I think Howard was a hard man to love.

_BlackWidow: _Hopefully if he has his cousins coming at Christmas he won't drink himself unconscious again.

_Pepperpot: _He promised me he'd never do that again.

_EpicShield: _And you believe him?

_Pepperpot: _Forever and always.

_HulkSmash: _That's deep.

_Pepperpot: _:)

* * *

_Please review! And I proofread it loads but it is two in the morning so all mistakes are mine, all mine, and no you can't have any :)_


	13. Chapter 13

_Sorry I haven't updated in 6 billion years! Uni work has been biting me on the butt :( AND GO AND SEE THE NEW SHERLOCK HOLMES FILM. SEE IT NOW. IT IS IMMENSE! :D :D I got back from uni on Friday night and took my brother to go see it Saturday :) Got in the car, all ready to go, very exciting about driving again, and the battery was dead. It didn't even think about starting. So we walked and luckily it wasn't busy and we got awesome seats at the back :D Did get a bit cold walking home though :P_

_Anyway, enjoy and please reviews! Reviews are like mince pies and Ducky's smile, they make me warm inside :)_

* * *

_StarkArc: _Um… Clint is passed out in the hallway…

_BlackWidow: _I noticed when I fell over him 5 minutes ago and bruised my arm.

_StarkArc: Why _is Clint lying passed out in the hallway?

_BlackWidow: _That is a long and boring story which can be easily summed up in one word.

_StarkArc: _Which is?

_BlackWidow: _Thor.

_StarkArc: _… Thor…

_BlackWidow: _Thor.

_StarkArc: _If Thor hit him with Mew-Mew we should probably check he isn't dead…

_BlackWidow: _I thought it was Meow-Meow we were calling it?

_StarkArc: _It was, but it's also the name of a very dangerous drug, so Bruce and I thought it would be better to change it before someone overheard us talking about a dangerous party drug :P

_BlackWidow: _The press would have a field day :)

_StarkArc: _Yes they would, but thanks to quick thinking their plans have been thwarted :)

So how is Thor responsible for Clint being unconscious in the hallway?

_BlackWidow: _Basically, Thor challenged Clint to a drinking contest.

_StarkArc: _Ah.

_BlackWidow: _Ah indeed. Needless to say, Thor won and Clint failed epically.

**Hawkeye has just signed in**

_Hawkeye: _Ow, my head.

_StarkArc: _This is why you should never have a drinking contest with the Norse God of Thunder!

_Hawkeye: _Gosh, thanks for telling me that, Tony, AFTER it happens.

_StarkArc: _You're very welcome :)

And Natasha is annoyed with you.

_Hawkeye: _She is?

_BlackWidow: _You bruised my arm.

_Hawkeye: _I did? O_o

_BlackWidow: _Yes you did, when I fell over you.

_Hawkeye: _That's hardly my fault!

_BlackWidow: _You could have been a bit more considerate about where you landed! I mean in the hallway? Really?

_Hawkeye: _I apologise, Natasha. Next time I have a drinking contest with the God of Thunder (which Tony just told me _not _to do) I will try to pass out in a more convenient place.

_BlackWidow: _That would be much appreciated.

Ohmygodsherlockholmesison! :D :D

_Pepperpot: _OH with the guy that looks like Tony in it?

_BlackWidow: _That's the one :D

_Hawkeye: _I cannot wait to see the new one! :D

_StarkArc: _You're a Sherlock Holmes fan? O_o

_Hawkeye: _Forever and always.

_Pepperpot: _Who isn't?

_BlackWidow: _Agreed :)

_Hawkeye: _Do you know how many anonymous henchmen I've killed?

_BlackWidow: _o_O Quite a few?

_Pepperpot: _You don't even have a nametag! You've got no chance!

_StarkArc: _Why don't you just fall down?

_BlackWidow:_ You're going to have to fill me in.

_Hawkeye: _We're watching Austin Powers.

_BlackWidow: _I am so coming to join you.

Where are you?

_Pepperpot: _Tony's room.

_Hawkeye: _We're all sat on his bed, it's comfier than mine.

_StarkArc: _That's because mine isn't covered in weaponry.

_Hawkeye: _True…

_Pepperpot: _Shazam!

_StarkArc: _Oh my god, Pepper marry me.

_Pepperpot: _:)

**BlackWidow has changed her status to 'Transferring to Tony's Room.'**

_BlackWidow: _Your mattress is so much comfier than mine!

_StarkArc: _That's cause I bought it myself, the SHIELD ones suck.

_BlackWidow: _I'm jealous.

_StarkArc: _Well that's your Christmas present sorted!

_BlackWidow: _Yay! :D

_Hawkeye: _Anyone watching Doctor Who Christmas day?

_StarkArc: _Obviously.

_Pepperpot: _I'm insulted by the question, as if there were any doubt!

_StarkArc: _Pepper, _please _marry me!

_Hawkeye: _Lols :)

_BlackWidow: _Where are we even having Christmas this year? Where's everyone going?

_Pepperpot: _Well I'll be at Tony's sitting on him to make sure he doesn't drink himself into oblivion as usual.

_StarkArc: _I promised you I wouldn't!

OMG I WANT SHARKS WITH LASER BEAMS ATTACHED TO THEIR HEADS! :O

_BlackWidow: _That's _your _Christmas present sorted!

_Pepperpot: _If you try it I will throttle you! And I know, Tony, and I don't doubt it :) You're just comfy to sit on.

_StarkArc: _Good to know.

_BlackWidow: _Clint? Where will you be at Christmas?

_Hawkeye: _Here probably. I might do some festive target practise.

_StarkArc: _How do you make target practise festive?

_Hawkeye: _You put up posters of Santa going head first down a chimney and practise shooting him in the ass.

_BlackWidow: _Sounds fun actually.

_Pepperpot: _Well I think we should all go round Tony's, I do a mean roast dinner.

_BlackWidow: _And you haven't lived till you've tried my sprouts.

_Pepperpot: _Plus, Tony's whole window turns into a TV so Doctor Who will be epic :D

_StarkArc: _Sounds good to me!

Not that I think I actually had a choice mind.

_BlackWidow: _True dat.

**RomanoffNatasha has 1 unread email from PottsPepper**

**Subject: Christmas! :D**

**Cc: StarkTony, BartonClint, RossBetty, BannerBruce, OdinsonThor, RogersSteve, CoulsonPhil, ParkerPeter, BlazeJohnny, PymJan, PymHank, RhodesJim, StormSue, StormJohnny, RichardsReed, GrimmBen**

Dear everyone,

So basically the plan this year is to totally invade Tony's house for Christmas :) Lots of food and music and stuff and Natasha has promised to gas us all with sprouts.

Hope you can come!

Love,

Pepper

Xx


	14. Chapter 14

_Should I be doing uni work? Probably. Should I be revising biology and how hand washing breaks the chain of infection? Probably. Should I be doing anything other than writing fanfics? Probably._

_So for your viewing pleasure, a nice long chapter into which I have poured my procrastination :) And for those of you in other countries who don't know what 'iPlayer' is, it's catch up TV. And for those of you who didn't watch Bublé, it's on there, go watch it now. And on Wii Mario you get other avatars in adverts for things :) I spotted my granddad in a perfume advert once o_O_

_Enjoy and Happy Christmas! :D :D_

_Review please :)_

* * *

_HulkSmash: _Merry Christmas ladies!

_Pepperpot: _Merry Christmas, Mr Bublé!

_BlackWidow: _Merry Christmas, Mr Bublé!

_RossBetty: _Merry Christmas, Mr Bublé!

_HulkSmash: _You ready to sing a little Jingle Bells?

_Pepperpot: _Yeesssss.

_BlackWidow: _Yeesssss.

_RossBetty: _Yeesssss.

_EpicShield: _Lost. Completely lost.

_StarkArc: _They're watching Home for the Holidays with Michael Bublé :)

_RossBetty: _So are you!

_StarkArc: _Not denying it :)

_BlackWidow: _Aren't your cousins coming today?

_StarkArc: _Yep :D Flight lands in 3 hours.

_Pepperpot: _There is a massive tin of Roses on the kitchen unit :O

_StarkArc: _Happy Christmas :)

_Pepperpot: _YOU GOT ME CHOCOLATE.

_BlackWidow: _Bagsy the caramel ones! :D

_RossBetty: _Strawberry ones cause Pepper's allergic, only thinking of you, Pepper :)

_Pepperpot: _And not at all of the chocolate.

_RossBetty: _My feelings are hurt that you would even suggest such a thing! :O

_BlackWidow: _Why is Bubbles married. Why.

_RossBetty: _ALL MY CREYS

_EpicShield: _Who's Bubbles? O_o

_Pepperpot: _It's annoying having to put the accent every time you write 'Bublé.'

**Hammered has just signed in**

_Hammered: _YOU DARE THREATEN THE SON OF ODIN?

**Hawkeye has just signed in**

_Hawkeye: _YES I DO.

_HulkSmash: _Well this ain't going to be good.

_BlackWidow: _What's happening?

_StarkArc: _Quite possibly the most intense game of Wii Mario ever.

_Pepperpot: _This I have to see.

Bubbles going on pause.

_EpicShield: _You can pause TV programs? O_o

_Pepperpot: _You can if they're on iPlayer :)

_BlackWidow: _Okay guys, budge up.

_RossBetty: _Your avatars. They are hilarious.

_BlackWidow: _Thor's hair is the best.

_StarkArc: _That annoying moment when you realise the Norse God of Thunder has nicer hair than you :P

_Hammered: _Why thank you red-headed maiden. I have discovered a creamy substance in the cupboard called 'L'Oreal.'

_StarkArc: _HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

_Pepperpot: _There is something ridiculously amusing about Thor using 'L'Oreal' shampoo.

_Hammered: _According to its container, it's 'because I'm worth it.'

_HulkSmash: _Can someone hit Tony on the back please?

_Pepperpot: _How can you be in last place _already?_

_Hawkeye: _Thor threw a banana at me ¬.¬

_RossBetty: _Seriously guys, I think Tony's going to die if someone doesn't hit him.

_StarkArc: _Thanks Betty :) peanut got stuck.

_Hammered: _Is there something amusing about me using shampoo?

_StarkArc: _Yes. Yes there is. Mainly because I was picturing you in an advert for it.

_Hawkeye: _'Th'Oreal.'

_BlackWidow: _XD

_RossBetty: _Aaand you've fallen off a cliff.

_Hammered: _IF I HAD MJOLNIR THIS WOULD NOT HAVE HAPPENED.

_StarkArc: _Although if you had mew-mew this entire game wouldn't be very fair.

_Hammered: _That is true Man of Iron.

_RossBetty: _Is that Tony in an advert for underwear? O_o

_StarkArc: _Oh yeah!

_BlackWidow: _Have you ever been in an advert for underwear?

_StarkArc: _Once, I was 19, Obie found out and had all the adverts destroyed. Shame, it was a nice pair of underwear.

_Pepperpot: _And you were asked by Calvin Klein a couple of years ago.

_StarkArc: _Oh yeah! And you said everyone would think I was gay :)

_RossBetty: _True :)

_Hammered: _WHAT IS THIS STRANGE GREEN THING?

_HulkSmash: _That would be Yoshi.

_BlackWidow: _'Yoshi! Yum' :)

_Hawkeye: _o_O

_BlackWidow: _That's the noise he makes! Although I'm not sure he _actually _says 'yum'.

_Pepperpot: _He should do, it's cute :)

_StarkArc: _I'm totally getting you a toy Yoshi for Christmas.

_Pepperpot: _Do it and I'll love you forever :)

**WebSwinger has just signed in**

_WebSwinger: _IT'S SNOWING OUTSIDE! :D :D And could you squidge up?

_StarkArc: _We need a bigger sofa.

_Pepperpot: _I'll sit on Tony and you can have my place :)

_WebSwinger: _Thanks Pepper :) Is that Tony on an advert for underwear?

_StarkArc: _Yep.

_WebSwinger: _Cause that's normal.

_StarkArc: _Of course :) Oh hi Pepper :)

_Pepperpot: _Hi Tony :)

_HulkSmash: _Has anyone else noticed that Steve's gone?

_StarkArc: _He said something about going to the gym.

_RossBetty: _So, Peggy, updates please, Stark.

_StarkArc: _I'm picking her up on Christmas Day and she's staying for a couple of days :)

_BlackWidow: _Yay!

_Hawkeye: _Does Steve know?

_Pepperpot: _We're trying to keep it a secret. Although you know how good we are at that.

_BlackWidow: _Secret Santa lasted a grand total of 20 seconds.

_RossBetty: _Hence why we gave up on that idea :)

_Hawkeye: _It was the right thing to do.

WHAT HOW DID YOU BEAT ME?

_Hammered: _THE SON OF ODIN ALWAYS TRIUMPHS!

_StarkArc: _:O

_WebSwinger: _o_O

_Hammered: _And I didn't even have to use Mjolnir :)

_Pepperpot: _Thor used a smiley.

_BlackWidow: _HIT ALL THE THINGS.

Okay, next time we have to have a contest as to who can fit in as many memes as possible.

_HulkSmash: _You're on.

_StarkArc: _CRAP STEVE'S COMING BACK.

_RossBetty: _He'll see the bit about Peggy!

_StarkArc: _Hang on, I'll change the language to Italian.

_EpicShield: _Hey guys.

_StarkArc: _Hi Steve!

_Pepperpot: _Oh you're back!

_BlackWidow: _Hi Steve!

_HulkSmash: _Hey buddy!

_WebSwinger: _Steve!

_Hawkeye: _Hey look who it is!

_Hammered: _Greetings frozen man.

_RossBetty: _How's it going, Steve?

_EpicShield: _Cause you're not acting all suspicious o_O

Um… why is some of the conversation in Italian?

_StarkArc: _It is? O_o

_BlackWidow: _Where? Everything's in English on my end.

_EpicShield: _This bit: _**RossBetty: **_**Così, Bob, aggiorna per favore, Stark. **

**_StarkArc:_ La raccolgo sul Giorno di Natale e sta per un paio di giorni:) **

**_BlackWidow:_ Yay! **

**_Hawkeye:_ Edward sa? **

**_Pepperpot:_ Proviamo a tenerlo un segreto. Sebbene lei sa come buono siamo a ciò.**

_StarkArc: _o_O That bit isn't on my screen, must just be a computer glitch.

_EpicShield: _That happens?

_Pepperpot: _It happened at work, I was trying to email one of the board directors in Ohio and the entire email changed to French when he got it.

_EpicShield: _Oh okay :) I'm going to make pizza, any requests?

_StarkArc:_ EAT ALL THE PIZZA.

_EpicShield: _Well that's Tony in.

_BlackWidow: _Omnomnom pizza :) Pineapple please!

_EpicShield: _See you in a sec!

**EpicShield has just signed off**

_Hawkeye: _BOB AND EDWARD?

_StarkArc: _Peggy and Steve are nouns! They don't translate into Italian! Steve would have seen them and known something was up, I had to change them.

_Hawkeye: _Why Bob and Edward?

_StarkArc: _Bob because it's the generic name that everyone thinks of, and Edward because I spotted Natasha's 'Twilight' DVD on the coffee table.

_BlackWidow: _IT'S NOT MINE.

_RossBetty: _Of course it isn't.

_WebSwinger: _Y u no admit to DVD owning?

_StarkArc: _Nice one :)

* * *

_Please review and I'll update fast :)_


	15. Christmas! Part 1

_So I was trying to work out how to do this and I decided to do it in IM form AND normal form, so it's in two parts, first one is IM, second is normal :) _

_So here is part 1 :) Enjoy! And please please please give me your ideas on things they get up too during their Avenger's Christmas Party! Anyway, Doctor Who is on now so I will return later :)_

_HAPPY CHRISTMAS! :D :D :D _

_Please review and I'll let you off getting me a present ;)_

* * *

**StarkArc has changed his status to 'HAPPY CHRISTMAS!'**

_BlackWidow: _HAPPY CHRISTMAS! Had a good morning?

_StarkArc: _Apart from a five year old jumping on my head at 7 in the morning, yes, I have had a good morning :)

_BlackWidow: _How is that adorable god-daughter of yours?

_StarkArc: _Adorable, I just wasn't able to appreciate it at 7 in the morning :) Pepper wasn't impressed either.

_Pepperpot: _I have a younger sister, I'm used to it.

_BlackWidow: _Where is she now?

_StarkArc: _We're in the kitchen making mince pies and a mess.

_BlackWidow: _And IM-ing at the same time?

_StarkArc: _Multitasker remember? :)

_Pepperpot: _Apparently we are now engaged in a flour war.

_StarkArc: _Right in the ear!

_Pepperpot: _I'm so glad I'm still in my pijamas right now.

_StarkArc: _Isabella decided it would be easier to just throw the whole bag at my face.

_BlackWidow: _Ow :P

_StarkArc: _What time are you coming over?

_BlackWidow: _About an hour :)

_StarkArc: _Awesome :) The kitchen will be a mess :)

_BlackWidow: _Glad to hear it :) I made a christmas yule log.

_StarkArc: _YAY! :D

_Pepperpot: _Whoop whoop! :D

Hello Natasha!

_BlackWidow: _Hello?

_Pepperpot: _That was Faye saying hello :)

_BlackWidow: _Hello Faye!

_Pepperpot: _She just hit me in the face with pastry.

_BlackWidow: _How lovely :)

_StarkArc: _She's getting very excited about the yule log :)

_BlackWidow: _It looks delicious, not going to lie :)

**EpicShield has just signed on**

_EpicShield: _I'm bringing a christmas pud :)

_Pepperpot: _YAY!

_StarkArc: _Pepper likes christmas pud!

_Pepperpot: _It's delicious! :D

_EpicShield: _I'm on the plane with Natasha coming over now :)

_StarkArc: _Faye says hello :)

_EpicShield: _Hello Faye :)

_Pepperpot: _She's getting very excited :)

**HulkSmash has just signed in**

_HulkSmash: _Ten minutes away! That includes Betty :)

_StarkArc: _Okay, we should probably get changed, we are currently covered in flour.

_Pepperpot: _A LOT of flour.

_StarkArc: _There are not enough words to describe how much flour we are covered in.

_HulkSmash: _See you in a sec!

**StarkArc has just signed off**

**Pepperpot has just signed off**

_HulkSmash: _Did you make the yule log like you said you were going too?

_BlackWidow: _Yep!

_HulkSmash: _YAY!

_EpicShield: _It's ridiculously chocolatey!

_HulkSmash: _YAY! :D

Ooh we're at Tony's, see you later!

**HulkSmash has just signed off.**

_BlackWidow: _Do Faye and Isabella speak English?

_EpicShield: _Tony says they do, which is good cause I don't speak a word of Italian :)

_BlackWidow: _I do :)

_EpicShield: _You speak everything!

_BlackWidow: _That's very true, I do :)

**StarkArc has just signed on**

_StarkArc: _Back and not covered in flour!

Pepper is still in there though, women take forever.

_BlackWidow: _We like a good soak!

_StarkArc: _I've noticed! And Bruce and Betty are here so I'll see you later :) Do you know how Thor is getting here?

_EpicShield: _I think he's flying over.

_StarkArc: _Makes sense :) See you later!

* * *

_Please review! :D_


	16. Christmas! Part 2

_I literally spent the whole of Boxing Day writing this and it's possible the longest chapter I have ever written of any story ever. Anyway, enjoy and please review because this took me flipping ages to write!_

_I don't actually live in America so I had to Google map how long it would take to get from Malibu to LAX, and you know how reliable that is so I probably got it wrong but hey, it's Christmas :) And I have no idea if Doctor Who shows on Christmas Day or Boxing Day in America so I put Christmas Day. And I have no idea if Maria Stark had a sister but in this she does and her name is Rosa. Isabella and Faye are both mine. _

_So now I've pointed out everything wrong with the story, please enjoy, I hope you had a truly epic Christmas, and Italian translations are at the end :)_

_Please review!_

* * *

'This,' Tony said, 'is Faye.'

'Nice to meet you Faye,' Betty laughed, shaking her hand.

'She looks like you,' Bruce said, scrutinising her. 'Your eyes and hair are the same colour.'

'She looks like my grandmother,' Tony explained. 'Mom and Aunt Rosa both look like her.'

Faye giggled and ran back into the kitchen.

'I like her,' Betty said. 'She's cute.'

'Cute and related to Tony,' Pepper said coming down the stairs. '_Not _a good combination.'

'I bet!' Betty laughed. 'Also, that tree is huge.'

All eyes turned towards the massive tree taking up a corner of the living room, covered in baubles and tinsel and lights with a silver star on the top, presents around the bottom.

Tony sighed. 'I didn't choose it, that was Pepper.'

'I grew up in a tiny house with a 4 foot tree every year. _That _is a _proper _tree,' Pepper said, smirking.

'Well it looks nice,' Betty said smiling. 'And that looks like a mattress shaped present to me.'

'How Natasha gets it home isn't my problem,' Tony said, grinning. 'Come and meet Isabella.'

The four of them walked into the kitchen where a woman who looked almost exactly like Tony was covering Faye in tinsel.

'She wanted to be a Christmas tree,' the lady explained with a soft Italian accent.

'This is my cousin, Isabella,' Tony said, grinning. 'And Faye spent the whole of yesterday running around covered in fairy lights.'

Isabella laughed. 'Nice to meet you,' she said. 'I would shake your hand but I have a small flour issue.'

'You weren't kidding when you said it was a mess,' Betty said, staring around. Flour covered every available surface, there was even some on the windows.

'Faye's aim isn't great,' Tony said, ruffling her hair.

'My aim is perfect,' Faye spoke up, surprising them by speaking English. 'Uncle Tony just wouldn't stand still.'

'Your English is perfect as well,' Betty said.

'Tony's fault,' Isabella explained. 'He's been speaking to her in English since the day she was born.'

'You can speak Italian can't you?' Bruce asked.

'Mia madre era italiana, ha deciso una mattina mi ha voluto essere spedito solo ha parlato così in italiano a me finché ero spedito. Fortunatamente ho avuto la porzione di Isabella me fuori,' Tony said grinning.

Bruce looked confused and Faye laughed. 'I'll take that as a yes then,' he said.

'I come bearing chocolate!' they heard Natasha yell as she came into the kitchen holding a cake tin, Steve behind her.

'Yay!' Faye said, jumping up onto the chair and grinning as Natasha put the cake tin down. 'Posso aprirlo?'

'Certo lei può,' Natasha said laughing. 'Also, that is a very mattress shaped present next to the tree.'

'Is it?' Tony said. 'I hadn't noticed.'

Natasha grinned and Steve introduced himself to Faye and Isabella.

'What's that nice smell?' he asked, sniffing.

'It's _either _the mince pies in the oven _or _the turkey. One or the other,' Tony said.

Isabella paused. 'I think it's both!' she said. 'We just invented a new smell.'

'Omnomnom,' Faye said.

Natasha laughed. 'Who taught you that?'

'Uncle Tony,' she said grinning.

'She hasn't stopped saying it,' Isabella said, hitting him over the head with a towel.

'It's a good phrase!' Tony protested.

'Posso indossare della musica per favore?' Faye asked.

'Sarà il Rat Pack non è esso?' Tony said.

Faye grinned and nodded. Tony laughed and lifted her onto the unit by the window. She tapped the screen and selected music and a few seconds later Frank Sinatra's 'Come Fly With Me' filled the house.

'She likes the Rat Pack?' Betty said, shocked. 'I like her even more!'

'The Son of Odin and the Man who is a Spider are here!' Thor shouted from the living room.

'Oh dear, now we're in trouble,' Bruce chuckled.

'We better go join him before he breaks something,' Pepper said. 'You can put 'Just Dance' on if you want, Faye.'

'Si si si!' Faye said excitedly, running into the living room.

'I am so on this,' Natasha said, running after her.

'Ditto,' Betty said, running after Natasha.

The oven beeped and Pepper opened it. 'Mince pies are done!' she said excitedly.

'Omnomnom!' They heard Faye yell from the living room.

**xXxXxXx**

'What is this?' Thor said, staring in confusion at the parsnip he was holding in his hand.

'It's a vegetable,' Isabella said, grinning. 'And that,' she pointed to his other hand. 'Is a sprout.'

'Natasha told me it was a "fartbomb"', he said, sounding confused.

'It's that too.'

Pepper was still trying very hard not to laugh at Thor's jumper, which had been a present from Clint. It was a very Christmassy jumper and although it was clearly the largest size, it still didn't fit properly. Pepper felt that her life was complete now she'd seen the Norse God of Thunder in a Christmas jumper, although it complimented his hair well. She sighed, it wasn't fair when the God of Thunder had nicer hair than you.

'Anthony!' Isabella yelled.

'Yes Izzy?' Tony yelled back from the living room, where him and Bruce were dancing 'A Little Less Conversation' on the Wii much to the enjoyment of the others.

'Are we boiling these or steaming them?'

'Steam them!' Natasha yelled. 'They taste nicer!'

'What she said!' Tony yelled.

Pepper chuckled and pulled out the steamer. 'I've never heard anyone call him Anthony, apart from Hammer.'

Isabella laughed. 'I've always called him Anthony, my mom used to, I guess it rubbed off on me.'

Tony walked in, having finished his dance and grabbed a potato peeler from the drawer.

'How many are we doing?' Isabella asked, staring at the enormous pile of vegetables.

Tony considered this then looked at Thor. 'All of them,' he said.

Pepper spotted the meaningful glance Tony gave Thor and laughed. 'I'll do the carrots she said.

'I'll do the parsnips!' Faye yelled, running in. They heard laughter from the living room where Natasha and Betty were on the Wii and, by the sound of it, where beating _everyone. _

Tony sighed. 'There goes my high score,' he said.

Thor looked surprised. 'You can dance?' he asked.

Faye giggled. 'Auntie Maria taught Uncle Tony and Mama to dance,' she said.

'I wouldn't say "taught"', Tony said. 'Maybe "forced"'.

Isabella laughed. 'I had come over for Christmas and we were going to the company Christmas party, Maria decided we had to learn to dance.'

'We were good to,' Tony said. 'Did the best foxtrot out of everyone.'

'That I do not believe,' Pepper said.

'Shall we demonstrate?' Tony look Isabella's hand and they started dancing round the kitchen, Faye laughed and Pepper stared, shocked.

'You've seen me dance before, Pep!' Tony said, letting go of Isabella's hand and grabbing a potato.

'Not like that!'

Isabella contemplated the oven. 'The turkey should be done it about two hours,' she said.

'I'll lay the table!' Faye said, running to the cupboard where Pepper had stored the Christmas things. 'Can we use the tablecloth with the snowflakes on it?'

'Of course,' Pepper said, smiling.

Isabella sighed. 'My daughter, wants to be a interior designer.'

'She'd be good at it,' Tony chuckled.

'I will help you,' Thor said, picking up the placemats.

'Thor is holding placemats, my life is complete,' Pepper said as they left the room. 'And it's half 11, Tony, are you still picking up Peggy?'

'Yes I am, thanks for reminding me,' Tony said, putting the potato he was peeling down and grabbing his jacket from the back of the door.

'Peggy Carter?' Isabella said confused.

'Yes,' Pepper said. 'You know her?'

'She used to come to the house to see Howard and Maria when we were young,' Isabella said.

'Did you live with Tony?' Pepper asked.

Isabella smiled. 'No, I lived in Venice with my mom, but we were always at the Stark's cause Tony and I were the same age, mom and Aunt Maria wanted us to grow up together. I remember Peggy, I liked her hair.'

'She did have awesome hair,' Tony said. 'Anyway, I better go, I'll sneak out the back, you're good at making up excuses if anyone notices I'm gone right, Izzy?'

'I got you covered, Anthony.'

**xXxXxXx **

Tony snuck out the back door and ducked behind the house to prevent anyone seeing him through the window as he made his way across his massive garden, and back into the house the other side. He made his way down to the garage and stared in shock at Dum-E and U who were watching 'Santa Claus' and had Santa hats on their robotic heads.

Tony laughed. 'Get upstairs,' he said. 'You can play "Just Dance", you'd probably be surprisingly good at it.'

The robots beeped happily and made their way to the lift as Tony got the Audi, roared the engine to life and made his way out of the garage and onto the highway.

Typically, it wasn't snowing but the road was clear and it only took 50 minutes to get to LAX, it helped that Tony had broken the speed limit the entire way there.

Peggy was stood by the arrivals board and smiled widely when Tony walked towards her. She was wearing a long red dress, her white hair curled prettily around her face and smiled broadly. 'Tony,' she said softly. 'It's so lovely to see you again.'

'And you, Peggy,' Tony said, hugging her. 'You look wonderful.'

'And you are looking as handsome as always,' she smiled. 'Would you mind carrying my bag? I'm not as strong as I used to be.'

'Of course,' Tony said, lifting up the suitcase and small bag which looked suspiciously like presents Peggy had next to her.

'How is Isabella?' Peggy asked as she followed Tony to the car. 'I hear she has a daughter now.'

'Isabella is wonderful,' Tony said, unlocking the car and putting Peggy's bags in the boot. 'Her daughter is Faye, she's five, they're exactly alike.'

Peggy laughed. 'I hope so, Isabella was a charming fiver year old.'

'How about me?'

'You were noisy.'

Tony laughed and pulled onto the road. They passed ten minutes in conversation, but Tony could tell Peggy was hesitant to bring up Steve, so he did it for her.

'Steve is at the house,' he said, seeing her freeze. 'Clint, that's Hawkeye, bought everyone Christmas sweaters, Steve looks odd in his.'

'Where's yours?' Peggy asked, raising an eyebrow.

They stopped at a red light and Tony unbuttoned his coat, showing the red and white sweater he was wearing.

Peggy laughed. 'It's nice! It looks warm.'

Tony chuckled. 'It is, and I actually like mine.'

There was a pause as Peggy looked out the window. 'It will be odd seeing Steve again,' she said slowly. 'I gave him up for dead a long time ago. Your father would take the boat out trying to search for him but…' she looked down at her lap and a single tear made its way down her cheek. 'Steve will still look as he always did,' she said softly. 'The years weren't so kind to me.'

Tony took her hand. 'You look fantastic for your age,' he said. 'And does it matter? Steve won't care.'

Peggy smiled and the light went green, Tony let go of Peggy's hand and put it back on the wheel as he revved the engine.

'I'm nervous about seeing him again,' she said. 'I guess I thought he wouldn't care about me now I've got old, but I guess you're right, he won't care.'

'Well if he does make a fuss we'll lock him in the cupboard,' Tony said, making her laugh.

'So who is at your house at the moment?' Peggy asked.

'At the moment?' Tony thought for a second. 'Well there's Pepper, Isabella and Faye, Thor, Clint, Bruce, Pete, Betty and Natasha. Agent Coulson is on his way over now, he should get here in about 20 minutes, the Fantastic Four should be here in half an hour, Johnny Blaze is going with them and the Pym's and Rhodey should have arrived when I left.'

'That's a lot of people!' Peggy said.

Tony drove the car into the garage and opened the car door for Peggy, she stepped out gingerly and laughed at Tony's workshop. 'You have more things in here then your father,' she said. 'It's just as messy though.'

Tony scrutinized his shop. 'Actually it looks tidier than normal, the robots must have gotten bored.'

Peggy looked around. 'Where are those robots of yours?'

'I left them playing on the Wii with the others,' Tony said. 'That could be interesting.'

He took Peggy's case and bag out of the boot and they made their way up the stairs and into the sitting room.

It went silent.

Tony put Peggy's bags on the floor and raised an eyebrow at Dum-E and U, who had been dancing 'Cotton Eyed Joe', and doing surprisingly well.

Peggy was staring at Steve, who looked shocked. 'Hello, Steve,' she said softly.

Steve got up and walked towards her and Tony raised an eyebrow at the others, who took the hint and made their excuses, quickly leaving the room. 'I'll go put your bags in your room,' Tony said to Peggy, giving Pepper a hug.

'Could you put the smaller bag next to that massive tree please, Tony?' Peggy asked, her eyes never leaving Steve.

Once Tony and Pepper had left the room, Peggy took Steve's hands. 'I missed you,' she said softly.

Steve was still staring at her. 'I'm sorry,' he said. 'I missed our date.'

Peggy smiled. 'You came back,' she said. 'That's more than enough for me.'

'I never learnt how to dance.'

'You never got the chance.'

Steve looked down at their clasped hands. 'I'm so glad you're here,' he said. 'I thought… I thought you were dead.'

'Tony thought so too.'

Steve looked at her. 'Was this his idea?'

Peggy nodded. 'He called me a month ago and told me you were back. He said I'd been listed as dead for the past eight years.'

'Why?' Steve asked.

'He said it was a computer virus, someone obviously didn't want you to know I was still alive.'

'No, I mean, why did he call you?' Steve said, looking confused.

'Because he cares about you,' Peggy said. 'Tony was alone on Christmas for years since his parents died. He obviously didn't want you to spend your first Christmas back in the world on your own as well.'

Steve smiled. 'He keeps surprising me,' he said. 'When I think he doesn't care about anyone other than himself he does this.'

'I've known Tony since he was very young,' Peggy said. 'He cares about everyone and everything.'

Steve looked at her, smiling. 'I'm glad you're here, Peggy.'

'So am I,' she whispered.

'Come and sit down,' Steve said. 'Annoying though he is, Tony does know how to throw a party.

Peggy laughed and followed Steve to the sofa.

'Okay, you can come out now!' Steve shouted and everyone filed back into the living room and said hello to Peggy. Dum-E and U continued their Wii game and Tony and Pepper went back down the stairs where they had sneakily been making out the entire time.

'Rhodey, Jan, Hank and Coulson are here by the way,' Pepper said, holding Tony's hand.

They went into the kitchen where Jan was helping Isabella put Natasha's Yule Log on a plate, Natasha and Faye were piling the cooked vegetables into bowls and Coulson, Rhodey and Hank were discussing how to blow up a house.

'Uncle Tony!' Faye said, jumping down and giving him a hug.

'Hey sweetie,' Tony said, grinning. 'Wotcha Rhodey.'

'Your god-daughter is adorable,' Rhodey informed him. 'However she is scarily like you.'

'I'm sure her mother would say that's a bad thing,' Tony said, lifting Faye onto the kitchen unit.

'Certainly would,' Isabella said laughing. 'Everything's done by the way and Faye and Thor have arranged the table.'

'_Sir, the Fantastic Four and Johnny Blaze have arrived,' _JARVIS informed them. Isabella jumped.

'I keep forgetting about him,' she said.

**xXxXxXx**

'The rule is, everyone has to wear their paper crown,' Natasha said once they'd all sat down at Tony's really rather large table and had massive piles of food on their plates.

There was a general murmur of agreement and everyone pulled their crackers. Thor, not knowing what a cracker was, had to be shown how to use it by Faye.

'These sprouts are delicious,' Pete told Natasha.

Natasha looked smug. 'Told you,' she said, pulling on her red crown.

Johnny Storm sent a fireball through the air which lit all the candles simultaneously.

'He's been practising that,' Sue Storm said. 'He kept setting everything on fire the first few times though.'

'Footsie?' Pepper whispered in Tony's ear. Tony nudged her leg and Pepper laughed.

'Have ALL the gravy,' Jan said, pouring loads onto her plate.

'Eat ALL the potatoes,' Clint said, stuffing his face.

'Make ALL the mess,' Coulson said, who had managed to knock over his (practically empty) glass of wine.

'Have ALL the sprouts,' Pete said, web slinging some over to his plate and accidentally hitting Thor in the face with one.

'Me gusta,' Faye said, who had managed to polish off most of the turkey already.

Reed stretched his arm over the table in order to grab the plate of parsnips. Thor was trying to put the tiny puzzle he'd got in his cracker together and managed to break it into small pieces then stare blankly at it. Johnny Blaze swapped his pink hair band with Faye's set of mini screwdrivers and Tony doodled a picture of Faye eating a turkey in the small silver notebook he'd gotten. Natasha and Clint multitasked eating with playing blackjack with the mini pack of cards Clint had got.

'Where did you get the Yule log from?' Johnny Blaze asked Tony. Tony pointed at Natasha with his fork and Natasha did a mock bow.

Bruce and Betty were arguing over who'd eaten all the carrots and Ben Grimm was eating his weight in stuffing, using a small trident and one of Natasha's throwing knifes to eat with.

They polished off the food in no time and Steve and Natasha brought out the Yule log and Christmas pudding. Coulson pulled brandy all over the pudding and Johnny Storm set fire to it, nearly setting fire to Sue's hair in the process. Thor ate most of both of them.

Tony, Pepper, Rhodey and Bruce put the dishes in Tony's industrial sized dish washer and Faye put Michael Bublé's Christmas album on. Johnny Blaze turned the fire on as the sky outside got darker and they sat around the tree.

'Right,' Bruce said. 'I reckon we grab all the presents with our names on them.'

'Good idea,' Sue agreed.

There then followed what can only be described as pile up where everyone jumped on each other in order to grab their presents and a snowstorm as paper was ripped off.

Natasha had opened her mattress first and the first thing she did was test how good it was to jump on. 'This is awesome!' she yelled, jumping up and down, laughing.

True to his word, Tony had bought Pepper a toy Yoshi which made her laugh. However, he'd also got her a mug saying 'World's Best PA' and a Pandora charm bracelet with a pepper charm and a homemade Arc Reactor charm on it.

Pepper got him a t-shirt with a picture of Iron Man on it and a fart machine with a sticky note on it saying 'to be used sparingly in epically boring meetings,' which made him then plan attacks on different members of staff. Clint have given him a massive framed poster of a Hot Rod and Steve have given him a picture of the Star Spangled Singers, pointing out one of the dancers on the right, which turned out to be his mother. Tony raised his eyebrows, 'she kept that one quiet!' he said. Natasha's present was a toy shark with a small plastic laser beam superglued to its head which made them all laugh.

Betty have given Bruce a massive pair of the stretchiest shorts ever seen ever and a small map which fit into a pocket inside them. She in return received a huge box of chocolates and a selection of different lip glosses in a small display box.

Natasha got a new gun from Coulson and a picture of her dancing on the Wii which Steve had sneakily drawn when she wasn't looking, along with her mattress from Tony, which she was now lying on. Clint had given her a set of smoke bombs and Thor had given her a blanket with a Spider on it.

Steve got a Captain America t-shirt from Clint which he'd spotted in HMV and a CD of greatest wartime classics along with a old-fashioned radio from Tony and a iPod filled with modern day songs from Natasha.

Clint got a new target practise board from Natasha and a set of arrows which Tony had made that played disco songs when fired. 'They should prevent others from attacking you,' he'd said. Steve had got him a packet of stickers with targets on them and a toy bow and arrow with suction cups instead of arrowheads to fire at them.

Thor got a bottle of hair lotion from Natasha 'for shiny, silky hair' and hairclips with flowers on them from Clint, which he put in immediately. Bruce got him a blow up hammer from a fairground he'd been to and Coulson got him ten boxes of poptarts.

Coulson got two packets of powered donuts and chocolate donuts from Natasha and a poster saying 'Keep Calm and Call Coulson' from Tony. Steve got him a t-shirt saying 'World's Best Secret Agent' and Clint gave him a book called 'How to be a bad-ass' which had been written by the Avengers and simply featured different pictures of Coulson in its pages.

Johnny Blaze had got a t-shirt with a skull on it from the Fantastic Four 'so you can look even more badass on a bike' and a DVD of the world's best bike stunts from Tony and Pepper.

Pete got a new camera from Tony and Pepper and a Christmas jumper from Clint which he put on. Natasha gave him a new bicycle and Thor gave him a box of biscuits.

Peggy gave Tony a key to the garage in New York where Howard's failed flying car was, telling him to fix it. She gave Isabella and Faye a picture of Rosa and Maria Carbonell at Christmas in 1948 and Steve a picture of the Howling Commandos with him at the front, along with a clipping from a newspaper taken when the war had ended, hailing Captain America as a war hero and a book of 20th Century history. Since Steve hadn't known she was coming, he hadn't got her anything, so he quickly borrowed some paper and drew a picture of Tony, Isabella, Faye and her sat around the tree together.

Faye, being a five year old, have the best haul, as everyone had brought her presents and she had enough toys, chocolate and games to last her a lifetime.

**xXxXxXx**

'Doctor Who time!' Natasha yelled, diving onto the sofa. Everyone, especially Clint who turned out to be a closet Doctor Who fan, raced to the sofa and grabbed cushions to hide behind in case it was scary.

The entire row of windows facing the ocean turned into the world's biggest indoor cinema and JARVIS turned the Christmas tree lights on. 'This better be good,' Clint said. 'I waited months for this.'

Tony and Pepper gave Steve a quick run through of what Doctor Who actually was and then a brief synopsis on the Chronicles of Narnia so he at least had a fighting chance of working out what was going on.

Once the episode was over, Tony announced he was going to try to build a working Sonic Screwdriver and everyone agreed it had been as epic as expected.

There then followed a 'Just Dance' contest and a massive binge on chocolate and crisps. When that was over, Peggy decided she really must teach Steve how to dance and suddenly the room was full of couples dancing with each other and swapping partners if there was an odd one out. Sue Storm decided to hold a dancing contest and it was widely agreed that Tony and Isabella had won with their tango, their prize was the remainder of Natasha's Yule log. However, before they knew it the clock struck midnight and Christmas was over.

'Best Christmas ever,' Natasha announced, hugging Tony and kissing his cheek.

'Thanks, Tony,' Steve said, smiling and holding Peggy's hand.

Tony had already cleaned out the guest rooms for them and got lots of hugs as everyone made their way upstairs, saying how much fun they'd had. Tony carried a sleeping Faye up to her room then stripped off and snuggled next to Pepper in bed. 'What do you think?' he asked.

'I think it beats watching you throw up over a toilet bowl,' she said, smiling and wrapping her arms round his waist.

'I think my liver thinks so too,' he said softly, kissing her. 'I love you, Pep.'

'I love you too, Tony,' Pepper replied, picking up her toy Yoshi and snuggling with both of them.

* * *

**Italian Translations**

_Mia madre era italiana, ha deciso una mattina mi ha voluto essere spedito solo ha parlato così in italiano a me finché ero spedito. Fortunatamente ho avuto la porzione di Isabella me fuori-_ My mother was Italian, she decided one morning she wanted me to be fluent so only spoke in Italian to me till I was fluent. Luckily I had Isabella helping me out.

_Posso aprirlo?- _Can I open it?

_Certo lei può_- Of course you can.

_Posso indossare della musica per favour?- _Can I put some music on please?

_Sarà il Rat Pack non è esso.-_ It's going to be the Rat Pack isn't it.

_Please review! :D_


	17. Chapter 17

_On a train at 5 in the morning, the joys of being a student nurse :P Anyway, here is chapter 16 for your viewing pleasure :) And yes, I wrote it on the train, and it's so dark outside I can't even see the tracks, we could be flying for all I know :P And a KitKat counts as breakfast right? _

_Please review! I will grant you some of the lemon drizzle cake I made the other day :)_

* * *

_StarkArc: _Pepperrrrr it's freezingggggg. Who invented meetings at 9am?

_Pepperpot: _I did warn you.

_StarkArc: _And I listened and am wearing three coats and several pairs of socks, it's not working! I'm still frozen :(

_Pepperpot: _My heart bleeds for you.

_StarkArc: _Fine, be like that. But who's going to give you earth-shatteringly amazing sex if I die?

_Pepperpot: _Don't die.

_StarkArc: _Yep, thought you'd say that :) You do realise the only way I'm ever going to be warm again is naked snuggles, right?

_Pepperpot: _Or maybe a good radiator?

_StarkArc: _You're comparing yourself to a radiator?

_Pepperpot: _Oh please you know what I meant.

_StarkArc: _But I'm cold now!

_Pepperpot: _The tower has central heating!

_StarkArc: _But I'm not at the tower, and I can't feel my toes :(

**Hammered has just signed in**

_Hammered: _WHAT IS THIS FLUFFY ODD TASTING WHITE STUFF?

_Pepperpot: _...

You thought it was FOOD?

_Hammered: _It's something else?

_StarkArc: _It's snow Goldilocks, and you seriously ate it?

_Hammered: _It looked like the fluffy substance Natasha makes occasionally.

_StarkArc: _That's mash potato, snow is something completely different. It's not edible for one thing.

_Pepperpot: _Never eat the yellow snow.

_StarkArc: _Stay well away from the yellow snow!

_Hammered: _That was the bit I tried.

_StarkArc: _Well now we know why it was odd tasting o_O

_Pepperpot: _That's gross.

_StarkArc: _Yay I can see the tower! Heating awaits :) I miss California :(

_Pepperpot: _It's blazing hot sunshine at the moment.

_StarkArc: _That's because you're there :) Can't you come over to the big apple and bring the sun with you?

_Pepperpot: _No, because I have a company to run.

_StarkArc: _But I miss you :(

_Hammered: _Is this the soppiness Clint warned me of between you two?

_Pepperpot: _This is nothing.

_StarkArc: _Our levels of soppy know no bounds.

**BlackWidow has just signed in**

_BlackWidow: _Some would argue that's a bad thing. And Tony, get your ass back to base as fast as possible, Bruce went Hulk and ripped out the heating pipes, my toes have icicles on them.

_StarkArc: _Why does everyone assume that just because I'm a mechanical engineer I'm also a plummer?

_BlackWidow: _You are aren't you?

_StarkArc: _Yes, but that's not the point.

_BlackWidow: _Well then, get over here.

_StarkArc: _I have a meeting to go too :(

_BlackWidow: _My toes are more important.

_StarkArc: _Pepper would disagree with you.

_Pepperpot: _'Fraid so, at least it's only a two hour meeting though.

_StarkArc: _That's still two hours of my life I'll never get back.

**Hawkeye has just signed in**

_Hawkeye: _TONY PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD COME AND FIX THE HEATING.

_StarkArc: _Already discussed this.

_Hawkeye: _ I woke up and my eyes were frozen shut! FROZEN SHUT.

_StarkArc: _I told you whoever built that helicarrier had no idea what they were doing.

_Hawkeye: _You built it!

_StarkArc: _I _fixed _half of it, plumbing not included.

_Pepperpot: _I still remember the time you tried to mend the kitchen sink :)

_StarkArc: _I already have one water feature in my house I didn't need another :)

_BlackWidow: _What happened?

_StarkArc: _All this water just exploded out of the sink at the exact moment Pepper walked in.

_Pepperpot: _I was on the phone too.

_StarkArc: _And Julie thought I was murdering you when she heard you yell.

_Pepperpot: _Good old Julie :)

_Hawkeye: _We're deviating from the point here.

_Hammered: _ALL THE POP TARTS ARE FROZEN.

_BlackWidow: _They're supposed to be, they were in the freezer.

_Hammered: _Oh.

_StarkArc: _If you're cold come over to the tower and play Wii Mario or something in my office while I'm at this stupid meeting.

_Hawkeye: _Natasha just grabbed her shoes and ran out the door. I've got a small feeling that she may have thought that was a good idea.

_StarkArc: _How can she run out the door? She's thousands of feet up in the air.

_Hawkeye: _She slides down the rope that says 'for emergencies only.'

_BlackWidow: _This counts as an emergency.

_Pepperpot: _Are you sliding and IM-ing at the same time? o_O

_BlackWidow: _Yep :)

_Hammered: _o_O Please don't fall off.

**EpicShield has just signed in**

_EpicShield: _Why did Natasha just slide past my window?

_Hawkeye: _She did?

_EpicShield: _Yep, she waved and everything o_O

_BlackWidow: _I'm nothing if not polite.

_Hawkeye: _Right behind you Tasha.

_EpicShield: _I'm coming too, it's freezing!

_Hammered: _The Green Giant's fault.

_EpicShield: _Green Giant?

_StarkArc: _He means Hulk not the tinned vegetable advert.

_EpicShield: _I did wonder.

_Pepperpot: _Are you there yet? Meeting starts in 5 minutes remember.

_StarkArc: _I'm not only there, I'm sat in the meeting room with my feet on the radiator and guzzling large amounts of coffee. And Julie is reading over my shoulder and finding everything hilarious.

_Pepperpot: _Just make sure your feet don't stink out the room.

_StarkArc: _My feet are fine, there is nothing wrong with my feet.

Julie concurs.

_BlackWidow: _On the ground!

_Pepperpot: _Already?

_Hawkeye: _She was basically free-falling the entire way, she was holding onto the rope with 3 fingers.

_StarkArc: _Natasha is always defying the laws of gravity.

_BlackWidow: _It's because I'm so awesome.

_Hammered: _That you are.

_Hawkeye: _Right, Steve and I are both down and are now engaged in a rat race to see who gets to the tower first.

_StarkArc: _This could be good.

_Hammered: _Obviously I'm going to win.

_BlackWidow: _Thor, with the greatest respect, that's why we're not including you.

And how can you not know what snow is? Don't the frost giants have any?

_Hammered: _Jotunheim's 'snow' is much different from Midgard's.

_Hawkeye: _In what way?

_Hammered: _It is rock solid and evil.

_BlackWidow: _... evil? ...

_StarkArc: _How can snow be evil?

_Hammered: _It just is, it's a sense, a feeling. Only an idiot would have a snowball fight in Jotunheim.

_Hawkeye: _That'd be me then.

_EpicShield: _I think I'm beating you, just so you know :)

_BlackWidow: _:P

_Hawkeye: _Just to warn you, Natasha does not take defeat lightly.

_BlackWidow: _Or at all.

_Hammered: _I have already arrived.

_StarkArc: _I know, the whole building shook.

_Hawkeye: _Meeting started yet?

_StarkArc: _Unfortunatly :(

_Hawkeye: _In sight of the tower!

Suddenly, a wild Natasha appears!

_BlackWidow: _Okay, now we're having a 300 metre sprint.

_EpicShield: _I'm going to win!

_BlackWidow: _No you're not!

_Pepperpot: _How can you text and chat at the same time?

_Hawkeye: _Years of practise.

_BlackWidow: _I WON! :D :D :D

_Hawkeye: _Buggerit!

Also, your secretaries all just gave us very odd looks.

_EpicShield: _We're red in the face, out of breath and covered in snow. It's not surprising.

_BlackWidow: _IT'S SO WARM IN HERE :D :D :D

_Hawkeye: _I can feel my fingers again ^_^

_BlackWidow: _Right, Mario time via a vending machine.

_Hawkeye: _Agreed.

_EpicShield: _Do the vending machines have snickers bars?

_StarkArc: _If Darren hasn't eaten them all then yes they do.

_Hawkeye: _Darren?

_StarkArc: _One of the R&D guys, he's slightly obsessed with snickers.

_EpicShield: _There's one left :D

_BlackWidow: _Maltesers FTW! :D :D

_StarkArc: _They are the best chocolate, followed by Time Outs.

_Pepperpot: _Which are especially delicious when they have been dumped in a cup of tea.

_Hawkeye: _Just thinking about it is making me salivate.

_Hammered: _Actually I believe you are salivating because you are staring at Natasha's chest.

_BlackWidow: _¬.¬

_Hawkeye: _Really, Thor? You had to say that?

_EpicShield: _Right now I'm concerned for your mortal well-being.

_Hawkeye: _You're not the only one :P

Please don't kill me.

_StarkArc: _She won't be that obvious, she'll think of something else to do, something sneaky and unexpected.

_BlackWidow: _Shellhead knows me too well.

_Hawkeye: _:P

_Pepperpot: _Are you actually paying attention?

_StarkArc: _Yes I am, and this guy is good!

_Pepperpot: _Really?

_StarkArc: _Yep, he's actually making sense and unlike some other members of staff I could mention he hasn't yet farted, tucked his shirt into his boxers or not done his fly up!

_BlackWidow: _Always a good first impression :)

And if I slide down the banister on a cushion will you hold it against me, Tony?

_StarkArc: _No, but I would be curious as to _why._

_BlackWidow: _Because this floor is basically deserted and there's a shiny banister and a cushion.

_StarkArc: _Go for it.

_Hawkeye: _Still can't quite figure out how you got to be CEO.

_StarkArc: _Because I'm a genius and have more money than sense, and I let people slide down banisters, and before you say anything, Steve, dad once had a banister race to raise money for charity.

_Hammered: _Who won?

_StarkArc: _It was a tie between me and Isabella :) We had really long sloping banisters at home and used to slide down them constantly. Mom was not impressed.

_BlackWidow: _You have to do it again, just so I have the satisfaction of beating_ everyone._

_Pepperpot: _Please, don't encourage him.

_Hawkeye: _Please do encourage him! I could slide down and shoot arrows at targets and things, this has the potential to be awesome.

_EpicShield: _I have to see that. Tony, you have to make this happen.

We'd need a charity though :P

_BlackWidow: _How about: Heat Our SHIELD Agents, or HOSA?

_Hawkeye: _An acronim within an acronim o_O

_EpicShield: _I think we should do a children's charity.

_Pepperpot: _Red Nose Day!

_BlackWidow: _I thought you weren't interested!

_Pepperpot: _Changed my mind, Red Nose Day is coming up? We could do something for that?

_Hawkeye: _With the CEO's permission of course.

_StarkArc: _HELL YES.

_Hammered: _That sounded like a yes to me. I will definetly be taking part.

_EpicShield: _Flying down the banisters doesn't count.

_StarkArc: _But it would be amusing.

_Pepperpot: _Okay, this is happening. I'll send some emails around :)

_BlackWidow: _We have wicked plans :)

_Hawkeye: _It's what makes us such awesome SHIELD agents :)

_StarkArc: _This is better than that idea we had to bungy-jump off the helicarrier :)

_Hawkeye: _We still need to do that.

* * *

_Please review!_


	18. Chapter 18

Sorry_ I haven't updated for ages! And I'm writing this on WordPad so I can't tell if it's a long or a short chapter o_O Probably a short chapter, I apologise in advance :)_

_Please review!_

* * *

**BlackWidow has just signed in**

_BlackWidow: _Where is everyone?

_EpicShield: _Ill :P

_BlackWidow: _Oh. Everyone?

_EpicShield: _Yep.

_BlackWidow: _Why are they all ill?

_EpicShield: _Some scientist on the 3rd floor was trying to find a cure for the flu, and he dropped the test tube on the floor and it sort of exploded, and all the vapour travelled up through the air vent and basically contaminated everywhere and everyone.

_BlackWidow: _Oh :P So they're all in their rooms?

_EpicShield: _No, we're all in Tony's room having a Big Bang Theory marathon.

_BlackWidow: _You're ill too?

_EpicShield: _No, I was just lonely cause everyone else was ill and was in Tony's room having a Big Bang Theory marathon.

_BlackWidow: _Are you contagious?

_EpicShield: _No, that's the only good thing about it.

_BlackWidow: _Okay, I'm coming to join you :)

**Pepperpot has just signed in**

_Pepperpot: _Tony's fallen asleep on my legs, and they're starting to go numb.

_HulkSmash: _Is he drooling?

_Pepperpot: _Yep.

_BlackWidow: _Aw he looks cute :)

_Pepperpot: _Tony only looks cute when he's asleep, or slightly puzzled.

_WebSwinger: _Why are we discussing how cute Tony is?

_HulkSmash: _Cause two members of the group have ovaries.

_Hawkeye: Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur..._

_BlackWidow: Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr purr purr._

_WebSwinger: _And now we're comparing Tony to a kitty.

_BlackWidow: _There is actually a tumblr page dedicated to creating gifs of Tony with cat ears.

_Pepperpot: _Googling it...

Oh my god.

_BlackWidow: _I might have to accidentially email that page to everyone at Stark Industries...

_HulkSmash: _Tony will love you forever.

_Hammered: _Why?

_Pepperpot: _He was being sarcastic.

_Hammered: _Oh, I'm not great at sarcasm :P

_BlackWidow: _OH MY GOD HE'S SO CUTE.

_Hawkeye: _What has HAPPENED to you?

_BlackWidow: _He's wriggling his nose and making cute noises! How is that not cute?

_Pepperpot: _It's not cute because he's wiping snot all over my skirt.

_BlackWidow: _But he's so cute!

_HulkSmash: _WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO YOU?

_BlackWidow: _I don't know :P I'm slightly scared.

_Pepperpot: _I think she's reached 'that' part of her life.

_BlackWidow: _I HAVE NOT.

_Hawkeye: _It's sounding like you have.

_Hammered: _Wait, I'm confused.

_Pepperpot: _Natasha wants a baby. Or a relationship. More than likely both.

_BlackWidow: _I DON'T want a baby.

_Pepperpot: _A relationship?

_BlackWidow: _...

_Hammered: _Still confused.

_Pepperpot: _Dot dot dot usually means yes, or that she's angry, but I don't think that's the case, or maybe it is. Actually, in this instance it's probably both.

_Hawkeye: _I'm available ;)

_BlackWidow: _Don't even think about it.

_Pepperpot: _Well you can't have Tony, he's mine.

And I'm currently using his hair as hand warmers.

_Hawkeye: _Come on, Tasha! I'll be a gentlemen and take you dancing?

_BlackWidow: _No.

_Hawkeye: _I'll convince you.

_BlackWidow: _You won't.

_Pepperpot: _He will.

_HulkSmash: _He will.

_WebSwinger: _He will.

_BlackWidow: _Oh please.

* * *

_Please review!_


	19. Chapter 19

_I'm so sorry I haven't updated this in FOREVER! I've been so busy with uni and stuff and omgtheavengersomgomgomg! :D When I sat down in the cinema I felt like I was on drugs for the whole thing it was IMMENSE._

_Anyways, please review! Love you all lots :)_

_And don't forget: You were made, to be ruled._

* * *

_StarkArc: _Okay, so, you kind of need to keep this from Fury, but I may have done something slightly stupid.

_HulkSmash: _Okay…

_StarkArc: _Basically, I blew up the elevator.

_HulkSmash: _Well Fury is going to be pissed.

_StarkArc: _Yes he is, which is why I'm not going to tell him.

_HulkSmash: _You can count on me :)

_StarkArc: _Good, it is also kind of your fault anyway.

_HulkSmash: _Howso?

_StarkArc: _I was working on that fuel formula you wanted me to look at, and basically, your 1's look like 7's.

_HulkSmash: _Oooooh dear.

So… what happened exactly?

_StarkArc: _Basically, I used too much accelerant and it kind of started smoking and sort of exploding.

_HulkSmash: _How does the lift come into this?

_StarkArc: _I threw the vat into the lift.

_HulkSmash: _Hahaha :D

_StarkArc: _Not sure Fury will see it like that :P

_HulkSmash: _No, probably not.

**BlackWidow has just signed in**

_BlackWidow: _You know what I'm going to say, so don't give me all your crap.

_StarkArc: _Yes, Natashalie, I am well aware that you a natural redhead.

_BlackWidow: _I just told you to _not _give me all your crap.

_StarkArc: _Fine, I'll give you a foot massage.

_BlackWidow: _Tony…

_StarkArc: _You never hear Pepper complaining.

_BlackWidow: _WHY is the elevator in pieces?

_StarkArc: _I don't know, but it had nothing to do with me.

_BlackWidow: _Do you expect me to believe that?

_StarkArc: _Yes.

_BlackWidow: _Well I don't, and you better get your ass down to Fury now.

**Hawkeye has just signed in.**

_Hawkeye: _He can't.

_BlackWidow: _And why is that? And WHY are you sticking up for him? You told me he was stuck-up.

_StarkArc: _YOU TOLD NATASHALIE I WAS STUCK-UP?

_Hawkeye: _That was _before _you made me my amazing new bow. And he can't see Fury because he's stuck under the Quinjet.

_StarkArc: _So you're only sticking around for my technology? That's charming.

_BlackWidow: _Why are you stuck under the Quinjet?

_StarkArc: _I was fixing the engine after it got Loki'd and the jack I was using to hold it up kind of collapsed and now I'm stuck.

_BlackWidow: _So you've basically just got squashed by a Quinjet.

_StarkArc: _Basically yes, I have.

_BlackWidow: _I am heading down there and this is so going on YouTube.

_StarkArc: _You're so lovely, you know that right?

And too late, Thor lifted it off me.

_BlackWidow: _Damn it! Well now you have to go to see Fury.

_StarkArc: _Ooops just got a call from Pepper, apparently I'm meant to be in a meeting right now. Better go!

**StarkArc has just signed off.**

_BlackWidow: _Did he get a call from Pepper?

_Hawkeye: _No, he grabbed his jacket and phone and ran out.

_HulkSmash: _Wait, he is still on the helicarrier right?

_BlackWidow: _Let's see how long it takes him to realise.

**StarkArc has just signed in.**

_Hawkeye: _Back so soon?

_StarkArc: _I forgot my car keys! I really am going now though.

**StarkArc has just sign off.**

_BlackWidow: _…?

_Hawkeye: _He just flew past the landing bay, turns out he had the suit with him.

_BlackWidow: _Obviously.

**IronMan has just signed in.**

_IronMan: _So long suckers!

_BlackWidow: _You are the scum of the earth :)

_IronMan: _And yet I still get a smiley face, lovely.

And at least I'm not a mewling quim.

_HulkSmash: _Please apply Aloe Vera to the BUUURRRN.

_BlackWidow: _Haha you're hilarious.

_Hawkeye: _'Mewling quim?'

_IronMan: _Loki's insult to Tasha.

_Hawkeye: _Haven't heard that one before.

_IronMan: _It's a medieval phrase, Loki is obviously not up to date on his insults.

_Hawkeye: _What does it mean?

_BlackWidow: _You do not want to know.

_Hawkeye: _I do! Tell me!

_IronMan: _Google it.

_Hawkeye: _OH MY GOD!

_BlackWidow: _I know right.

_Hawkeye: _He called you that?

_BlackWidow: _Yep.

_Hawkeye: _To your FACE?

_BlackWidow: _No, to my ass, obviously my face!

_Hawkeye: _I would have told him to go wash his mouth out with soap.

**ManWithThePatch has just signed in.**

_IronMan: _Yep, that's my exit.

**IronMan has just signed off.**

_ManWithThePatch: _STARK!

* * *

**LOKI'D!**


	20. Chapter 20

_Oh boy I haven't updated in aaaages! Sorry guys! Don't worry, there will be a super long chapter coming your way soon to make up for it :)_

_Please review! Love you all :)_

_WHO'S SEEN THE AVENGER'S BLOOPERS?! :D :D_

_COULSOOOON!_

_JARVIS don't ever speak to me once I'm off camera._

* * *

_StarkArc: _I just downloaded the 'whip' app from the 'Big Bang Theory', it's the single most amazing thing I've ever done.

_Hawkeye: _So the next time Fury orders Coulson or Hill around…

_StarkArc: _CRACK!

_Hawkeye: _Mwhahaha :D

_BlackWidow: _OH MY DAYS THAT SOUNDS GOOD.

_StarkArc: _I was expected you to tell me off!

_Hawkeye: _At heart she has a wicked sense of humour, it's hilarious.

_Hammered: _What is this 'app' you speak of?

_Hawkeye: _We bought you an iPhone!

_Hammered: _I may have sat on it…

_StarkArc: _Why doesn't that surprise me?

**Pepperpot has just signed in**

What up, Pep?

_Pepperpot: _Remember Mr Cradit?

_StarkArc: _You mean Crap-it? Indeed I do.

_Hawkeye: _Crap-it?

_StarkArc: _I'll explain later.

_Pepperpot: _Well one of your employees decided it would be a good idea to start a blog devoted solely to CEO's that forget to do their flies up.

_StarkArc: _Let me guess, it was someone on the 8th floor?

_Pepperpot: _How did you guess.

_Hammered: _I am confused. The 8th floor? What does that refer to? And what's a CEO? And what are flies? And what's blog?

_StarkArc: _Well that's a lot of questions o_O The 8th floor is the IT floor at Stark Industries, hence why it would be easy for them to start a blog. A CEO is what I am, a Chief Executive Officer, it means I own a company and am by extension completely awesome.

_BlackWidow: _And big-headed.

_Pepperpot: _We all knew that already.

_Hammered: _I see, so what are flies and a blog?

_Hawkeye: _Flies are small buzzing insects that go bzzzzzzz and generally get in the way, until they get shot at with an arrow that is. But in this instance they're the zipper on your trousers. And a blog is this online website… you know what, never mind, you won't understand it.

_StarkArc: _Okay let me guess, Crap-it found out about this blog?

_Pepperpot: _Indeed he did, and oh boy is he not happy about it.

_StarkArc: _That man has no sense of humour.

_Pepperpot: _No he does not. Anyway, you better call him and apologise and then call the IT team and give them a verbal spanking.

_StarkArc: _Even though I find it hilarious?

_Pepperpot: _Yep :) You do realise you make several appearances right?

_StarkArc: _I'd certainly hope so :)

What are you doing this evening? Dinner?

_Pepperpot: _I'm free from 7 :)

_StarkArc: _I'll meet you at the office then :)

**Pepperpot has just signed off**

I'm going to marry her.

_BlackWidow: _Wouldn't surprise me.

_Hawkeye: _Wouldn't surprise any of us :) So when you gonna pop the question?

_StarkArc: _Dunno, at the perfect moment.

_Hawkeye: _Everyone says that.

_StarkArc: _Not everyone is a billionaire :)

_Hawkeye: _Very true.

_Hammered: _What's a billionaire?

_StarkArc: _Someone's who filthy rich and can afford to keep replacing the kitchen appliances, mainly toasters and microwaves, after the God of Thunder gets annoyed with them. Wait… that doesn't half sound familiar…

_BlackWidow: _You have a CEO to apologise to, get on with it then we can decide where you're going for your date tonight.

_StarkArc: _I can manage on my own!

_BlackWidow: _Without me you can't manage at all, trust me, we got this.

_StarkArc: _Alright MOM. In the words of Vigo from Ghostbusters 2, 'death is but a door, time is but a window, I'LL BE BACK.'

_BlackWidow: _I'll await your return with batted breath.

**StarkArc has just signed off.**

_Hawkeye: _CRACK!

_BlackWidow: _Hahaha :)

_Hawkeye: _Hey, Tasha, we should get married.

_BlackWidow: _Buy me a drink first.

_Hawkeye: _Such hard work!

_BlackWidow: _But worth it ;)

**BlackWidow has just signed off.**

_Hawkeye: _You're on :)

**Hawkeye has just signed off.**

_Hammered: _Wait, what just happened? O_o


End file.
